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You can never make a woman happy, it's impossible. I've never met a happy woman in my life. They're always complaining about something.
Chris Rock
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Chris Rock
Age: 59
Born: 1965
Born: February 7
Comedian
Film Actor
Film Director
Film Producer
Screenwriter
Stand-Up Comedian
Television Actor
Television Presenter
Television Producer
Andrews
South Carolina
Cris Rock
Christopher Julius Rock III
Lil penny
Christopher Rock
Happy
Woman
Something
Make
Always
Complaints
Never
Complaining
Life
Mets
Impossible
More quotes by Chris Rock
Black comics, they only watch Black comedians. You're a comedian you're not just a Black comedian. You're a comedian. I try to get that through to everybody.
Chris Rock
A lot of racism going on in the world right now. Who's more racist? Black people or white people? Black people. You know why? 'Cuz we hate black people too! Everything white people don't like about black people, black people really don't like about black people.
Chris Rock
I just remember that whenever I got really mad or passionate, like in an argument, people would laugh, and I'd be dead serious. It would happen a lot. So it was like, Gee, I've got something here.
Chris Rock
Community college is like a disco with books: Here's ten dollars let me get my learn on!
Chris Rock
If a woman tells you she's twenty and looks sixteen, she's twelve. If she tells you she's twenty-six and looks twenty-six, she's damn near fourty.
Chris Rock
You got a gun, you don't have to work out.
Chris Rock
If your work is so smart that only smart people get it, it's not that smart.
Chris Rock
You cannot win in a fight against women, cause men have a need to make sense
Chris Rock
I'm old enough to remember when there were no black quarterbacks - there were no blacks on TV. I hope my son or daughter doesn't have to be as fixated on race as I am, because he or she will grow up in freer times.
Chris Rock
I've been married for 10 years and, you know, it's hard, you spruce it up and you go places. How do you spruce up anything? Artificially. You go places and do things.
Chris Rock
You only know that you're smart because you're around dumb people from time to time!
Chris Rock
I don't write jokes first. I write down topics. I think of what I want to talk about, and then I write the jokes - they don't write me... And even if you don't think it's funny, you won't think it's boring. You might disagree, but you'll listen. And maybe even laugh as you disagree.
Chris Rock
America is the only place where people go hunting on a full stomach.
Chris Rock
Black people dominate sports in the United States. 20% of the population and 90% of the final four.
Chris Rock
Gas is getting so expensive I'm gonna ride a mexican to work.
Chris Rock
School shootings were invented by blacks... and stolen by the white man.
Chris Rock
I'm a rap comedian the same way Bill Cosby is a jazz comedian, Cosby's laid back. I'm like, bang, bang bang, right into it.
Chris Rock
Stop the violence! Can't we all just get along?
Chris Rock
I don't think my comedy is that political. It's more social. But whatever. When you make comedy and you do stand-up, you work alone. Movies have to go under so much scrutiny. A stand-up special is a vision, and a movie is a consensus in a lot of ways.
Chris Rock
Gay people got a right to be as miserable as everybody else.
Chris Rock