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You can never make a woman happy, it's impossible. I've never met a happy woman in my life. They're always complaining about something.
Chris Rock
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Chris Rock
Age: 59
Born: 1965
Born: February 7
Comedian
Film Actor
Film Director
Film Producer
Screenwriter
Stand-Up Comedian
Television Actor
Television Presenter
Television Producer
Andrews
South Carolina
Cris Rock
Christopher Julius Rock III
Lil penny
Christopher Rock
Life
Mets
Impossible
Happy
Woman
Something
Make
Always
Complaints
Never
Complaining
More quotes by Chris Rock
When I hear people talk about juggling or the sacrifices they make for their children, I look at them like they're crazy because sacrifice infers that there was something better to do than the thing - than being with your children.
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Gay people got a right to be as miserable as everybody else.
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My mother is the kind of woman you don't want to be in line behind at the supermarket. She has coupons for coupons.
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Money is the best lotion in the world.
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You could be married and bored or single and lonely. Ain't no happiness nowhere.
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I love black people, but I hate niggers.
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You can only offend me if you mean something to me.
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Hollywood's just not funny.
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I see as white people finding loopholes in the slavery laws.
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I'm old enough to remember when there were no black quarterbacks - there were no blacks on TV. I hope my son or daughter doesn't have to be as fixated on race as I am, because he or she will grow up in freer times.
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When you make drama you are like Picasso. Drama is whatever you want it to be.
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Bill Cosby was the first comedian I was exposed to, because he doesn't curse.
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There are people who would like to get rid of minimum wage. But we have to have it, because if we didn't some people would not get paid money. They would work all week for two loaves of bread and some Spam.
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Most parts in comedy, they're not really written for men. They're written for, like, these boy-men.
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You can't fake comedy - it's not like a movie, where a director can just cast a pretty face.
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You know those guys that go to the strip club at the daytime? If you're at a strip club, and the sun is out, you got some problems!
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Before I was a comedian, I thought the coolest thing that would happen to me was being a teenager... Boy, was I wrong!
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When you make comedy, you make it for the people and you try to have as many screenings and as many tests and you do focus groups and you read the cards and you try to give the people what they want in this comedy.
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Black people have been qualified to be president for hundreds of years. George Washington Carver could have been president. I could go on with a list of black men that were qualified to be the president of the United States. So the Obama victory is progress for white people.
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There's a difference between racism and I don't know any better. I'm clueless. Racism is like, I'm trying to make you feel bad. That's racism.
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