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I'm happy if everybody else is. I'm a big brother, the oldest. If you're happy and I'm not, I'm cool with that. If I'm happy and you're not, I'm sad.
Chris Rock
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Chris Rock
Age: 59
Born: 1965
Born: February 7
Comedian
Film Actor
Film Director
Film Producer
Screenwriter
Stand-Up Comedian
Television Actor
Television Presenter
Television Producer
Andrews
South Carolina
Cris Rock
Christopher Julius Rock III
Lil penny
Christopher Rock
Oldest
Cool
Brother
Everybody
Happy
Bigs
Else
More quotes by Chris Rock
Every comedian has a moment in his life when he realizes he's a little bit different from everyone else. It's like being the only guy in a movie who sees the ghost. The ghost talks to you and you talk to him. Then you turn to your friend and say, Hey. Do you see that ghost? And he says, What ghost?
Chris Rock
I'm in show business... I want to hang out with Janet Jackson, not Jesse Jackson.
Chris Rock
A comedy club is a place where you work out material, you're trying material.
Chris Rock
When you die at 72, no matter what you die of, it's natural causes. Even if you get hit by a truck, it's natural causes. 'Cause if you was younger, you'd have got out the way!
Chris Rock
By the time I was 7 or 8, I wanted to be a comedy writer.
Chris Rock
People basically aren't that racist. They want their laughs. If I make a white guy laugh, he's gonna come see me. He's not gonna go see the white guy who doesn't make him laugh just because that guy is white.
Chris Rock
The two best things you can do for a person is have sex or make them laugh.
Chris Rock
It used to take years to become a junkie. But crack cut that down to 37 minutes.
Chris Rock
I used to have horrible cars that would always end up broken down on the highway. When I tried to flag someone down, nobody stopped. But if I pushed my own car, other drivers would get out and push with me. If you want help, help yourself - people like to see that.
Chris Rock
Most parts in comedy, they're not really written for men. They're written for, like, these boy-men.
Chris Rock
My mother is the kind of woman you don't want to be in line behind at the supermarket. She has coupons for coupons.
Chris Rock
Money is the best lotion in the world.
Chris Rock
If you wanna get away with murder, all you gotta do is shoot somebody in the head and put a demo tape in their pocket! 'This is a rap killing! Let's get outta here!'
Chris Rock
You can't fake comedy - it's not like a movie, where a director can just cast a pretty face.
Chris Rock
Right now, my job is that I'm like an ambulance chaser. I've got to look for movies with white guys falling out of them.
Chris Rock
I think it’s better to have ideas. You can change an idea changing a belief is trickier.
Chris Rock
The government doesn't want you to use YOUR drugs, they want you to use THEIR drugs.
Chris Rock
I don't write jokes first. I write down topics. I think of what I want to talk about, and then I write the jokes - they don't write me... And even if you don't think it's funny, you won't think it's boring. You might disagree, but you'll listen. And maybe even laugh as you disagree.
Chris Rock
Comedians are the one who have to tell the emperor he has no clothes on.
Chris Rock
Just to be clear, Ray Rice was not fired for beating his wife. He was fired because a video of him beating his wife was released.
Chris Rock