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Eddie Murphy is to comedians what Nicki Minaj is to Spanx.
Chris Rock
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Chris Rock
Age: 59
Born: 1965
Born: February 7
Comedian
Film Actor
Film Director
Film Producer
Screenwriter
Stand-Up Comedian
Television Actor
Television Presenter
Television Producer
Andrews
South Carolina
Cris Rock
Christopher Julius Rock III
Lil penny
Christopher Rock
Nicki
Eddie
Murphy
Comedians
Comedian
More quotes by Chris Rock
If you live below your means, you can turn down stuff all the time.
Chris Rock
All people naturally hate. My kid bites people now. I didn't teach my kid to bite anybody. Kids say mean stuff. Only through love do we get this evil out of them. Only through love and structure and discipline do they not hate. The kids that hate didn't learn anything, that's the problem.
Chris Rock
Gun control? We need bullet control! I think every bullet should cost 5,000 dollars. Because if a bullet cost five thousand dollar, we wouldn't have any innocent bystanders.
Chris Rock
If Bill Gates woke up with Oprah's money he'd jump out the window.
Chris Rock
Men lie the most. Men lie all the time.
Chris Rock
The only plan I have is to not do anything I don't want to do - and to never work just for money.
Chris Rock
I've been married for 10 years and, you know, it's hard, you spruce it up and you go places. How do you spruce up anything? Artificially. You go places and do things.
Chris Rock
I see as white people finding loopholes in the slavery laws.
Chris Rock
I'm an independent, but I got to admit I lean Democratic.
Chris Rock
I have four jackets, five pants, whatever, that are all the same. If you see U2 in concert, they wear the same thing every night. They just got a bunch of them. Albert Einstein used to wear brown suits every day. Why waste brainpower on something that is trivial?
Chris Rock
Are we so desperate for entertainment that we will fall for a Trickless magician?? Saw a woman in half. Pull a rabbit out of a hat. Do something! What tricks does this guy have? I'm in a box...and I ain't gonna eat.. I'm in a box... and I ain't gonna eat!! That ain't no trick! That's called living in the projects!
Chris Rock
You could be married and bored or single and lonely. Ain't no happiness nowhere.
Chris Rock
Only married people understand you can be miserable and happy at the same time.
Chris Rock
A white boy that makes C's in college can make it to the White House.
Chris Rock
I'm a nerd. I'm a little guy... the last guy you'd expect in a romantic movie.
Chris Rock
Never go to clubs with metal detectors. Sure it feels safe inside. But what about all those niggas waiting outside with guns? They know you ain't got one.
Chris Rock
When you have kids, there's no such thing as quality time. There's just time. There's no, 'Ooh, his graduation's better than going to the mall.' It's all kind of equal. Changing her diaper and her winning a contest - it's all good.
Chris Rock
Right now, my job is that I'm like an ambulance chaser. I've got to look for movies with white guys falling out of them.
Chris Rock
Oprah is rich Bill Gates is wealthy. If Bill Gates woke up tomorrow with Oprah's money, he'd jump out of a window and slit his throat on the way down saying, 'I can't even put gas in my plane!'
Chris Rock
You don't need a critic to tell you people aren't laughing.
Chris Rock