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Men are handicapped when it comes to arguing, 'cause we have a need to make sense.
Chris Rock
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Chris Rock
Age: 59
Born: 1965
Born: February 7
Comedian
Film Actor
Film Director
Film Producer
Screenwriter
Stand-Up Comedian
Television Actor
Television Presenter
Television Producer
Andrews
South Carolina
Cris Rock
Christopher Julius Rock III
Lil penny
Christopher Rock
Sense
Need
Needs
Make
Handicapped
Men
Arguing
Cause
Causes
Comes
More quotes by Chris Rock
Most parts in comedy, they're not really written for men. They're written for, like, these boy-men.
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Stand-up is the only career like that where once you get really big at it, people kind of encourage you not to do it.
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Only married people understand you can be miserable and happy at the same time.
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If a kid calls his grandma Mommy and his mama Pam, he's going to jail!
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Men lie the most. Men lie all the time.
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Carol Leifer is funny, really funny.
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Only dumb people try to impress smart people. Smart people just do what they do.
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Success is just hanging out with my kids. I mean, I always say if you have options, you're rich. To me, success is the fact that hey, I just did a movie and maybe I'll do some stand up, maybe I'll will write a book or maybe I will do a play.
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I don't write jokes first. I write down topics. I think of what I want to talk about, and then I write the jokes - they don't write me... And even if you don't think it's funny, you won't think it's boring. You might disagree, but you'll listen. And maybe even laugh as you disagree.
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Yeah, it's unfair that you can get judged by something you didn't do, but it's also unfair that you can inherit money that you didn't work for.
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I'm old enough to remember when there were no black quarterbacks - there were no blacks on TV. I hope my son or daughter doesn't have to be as fixated on race as I am, because he or she will grow up in freer times.
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Why do people do yoga? To clear their minds? I embrace the clutter in my head.
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My mother is the kind of woman you don't want to be in line behind at the supermarket. She has coupons for coupons.
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I hate niggas! I hate em! I wish they'd let me join the Ku Klux Klan!
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Artistically I'm curious. But in life? No. I can go to a restaurant and order the same thing for 10 years.
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Comedy is the blues for people who can’t sing.
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If poor people knew how rich rich people are, there would be riots in the streets.
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I love having somebody there - that companion thing. You know who you're going to eat with, who you're going to see a movie with.
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The thing I try to get across to the writers - and I do a lot of writing, too - is that when I do stand-up, nothing I talk about is funny. Everything is really sad and tragic and then I make it funny.
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When you have kids, there's no such thing as quality time. There's just time. There's no, 'Ooh, his graduation's better than going to the mall.' It's all kind of equal. Changing her diaper and her winning a contest - it's all good.
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