Quote

If you wanna get away with murder, all you gotta do is shoot somebody in the head and put a demo tape in their pocket! 'This is a rap killing! Let's get outta here!'

Chris Rock

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Chris Rock
Age: 59
Born: 1965
Born: February 7
Comedian
Film Actor
Film Director
Film Producer
Screenwriter
Stand-Up Comedian
Television Actor
Television Presenter
Television Producer
Andrews
South Carolina
Cris Rock
Christopher Julius Rock III
Lil penny
Christopher Rock
Away
Rap
Demo
Home
Shoot
Outta
Murder
Demos
Killing
Pocket
Humor
Wanna
Somebody
Tape
Head
Pockets
Funny
Gotta

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The key to staying together is making sure you guys like each other and need each other.
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Unlike flying or astral projection, walking through walls is an earthbound pursuit.
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You don’t need no gun control, you know what you need? We need some bullet control. Men, we need to control the bullets, that’s right. I think all bullets should cost five thousand dollars… five thousand dollars per bullet… You know why? Cause if a bullet cost five thousand dollars there would be no more innocent bystanders.
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Before I was a comedian, I thought the coolest thing that would happen to me was being a teenager... Boy, was I wrong!
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There's a difference between racism and I don't know any better. I'm clueless. Racism is like, I'm trying to make you feel bad. That's racism.
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My movies are okay, but they're not my specials.
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You don't pay taxes they take them from your check. That's not a payment - that's a 'jack.
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Daddy pays for the water, daddy pays for the gas, daddy pays for the electricity, and if daddy didn't pay for the electricity, he'd pay for the candle on your nightstand, so you can study for the big test tomorrow.
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That's a sure sign someone is going crazy - when he refers to himself in the third person, talks in low tones, and walks around wearing shades all day!
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Bill Cosby was the first comedian I was exposed to, because he doesn't curse.
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Carol Leifer is funny, really funny.
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If you properly clean a room, it gets dirtier before it gets cleaner.
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You can never make a woman happy, it's impossible. I've never met a happy woman in my life. They're always complaining about something.
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You can write a great country record and still be angry. Who's angrier than Toby Keith? He's angrier than the average 10 rappers.
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I can see the humor in just about any situation. After I lost my dad, I realized that none of us should take things too seriously, because everything except death works itself out.
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Give me a black man, a white woman, a giraffe, a zebra anything but another white man! That last one f***ed up my roof!
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When you make comedy, you make it for the people and you try to have as many screenings and as many tests and you do focus groups and you read the cards and you try to give the people what they want in this comedy.
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So there's a cloud of rage around me, but being an artist kind of changes that. No matter what you thought coming in, what ignorant thing you believed, you're in show business for two years, you're like, OK, I was wrong. It's hard to be mad at any particular group of people when you're an artist.
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Just to be clear, Ray Rice was not fired for beating his wife. He was fired because a video of him beating his wife was released.
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If you’re a black Christian, you have a real short memory.
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