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You know those guys that go to the strip club at the daytime? If you're at a strip club, and the sun is out, you got some problems!
Chris Rock
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Chris Rock
Age: 59
Born: 1965
Born: February 7
Comedian
Film Actor
Film Director
Film Producer
Screenwriter
Stand-Up Comedian
Television Actor
Television Presenter
Television Producer
Andrews
South Carolina
Cris Rock
Christopher Julius Rock III
Lil penny
Christopher Rock
Humor
Problems
Guy
Daytime
Funny
Strip
Problem
Club
Clubs
Sun
Guys
More quotes by Chris Rock
See, the Black man gotta fly to get to something the white man can walk to.
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Stand-up is the only career like that where once you get really big at it, people kind of encourage you not to do it.
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I don't get high, but sometimes I wish I did. That way, when I messed up in life I would have an excuse. But right now there's no rehab for stupidity.
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I do what I can do when I can do it.
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Right now, my job is that I'm like an ambulance chaser. I've got to look for movies with white guys falling out of them.
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Whatever your woman is into, you better be into. Whatever your man is into, you better be N2. Your partner into church, you better be into church. Your man or woman a crack head, you better be a crack head ... Otherwise it just won't work.
Chris Rock
Two hours of sparkling entertainment spread out over a four-hour show.
Chris Rock
You know, some people say life is short and that you could get hit by a bus at any moment and that you have to live each day like it's your last. Bullshit. Life is long. You're probably not gonna get hit by a bus. And you're gonna have to live with the choices you make for the next fifty years.
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Give me a black man, a white woman, a giraffe, a zebra anything but another white man! That last one f***ed up my roof!
Chris Rock
Babies don't know who's rich and who's poor. You love 'em and they're happy.
Chris Rock
I can't cook, but I have a nice book of menus... and I can plate and set the table.
Chris Rock
We got no wealthy black people. We got rich people. Shaq is rich. The guy who signs his checks is wealthy.
Chris Rock
The two best things you can do for a person is have sex or make them laugh.
Chris Rock
Early in my career it was very important that I gain the reputation. I haven't been on the road in two or three years, but when I say tickets are on sale, I know they're going to be gone, even if my movie bombed or my TV show sucked.
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Tomorrow is more sure than just about anything else in the entire world.
Chris Rock
You know you're rich when you have to drive for a half hour to get to your house once you're on your property.
Chris Rock
I used to have horrible cars that would always end up broken down on the highway. When I tried to flag someone down, nobody stopped. But if I pushed my own car, other drivers would get out and push with me. If you want help, help yourself - people like to see that.
Chris Rock
No, I want big ol' titties in my face!
Chris Rock
I don't need a president with a bucket list!
Chris Rock
All people naturally hate. My kid bites people now. I didn't teach my kid to bite anybody. Kids say mean stuff. Only through love do we get this evil out of them. Only through love and structure and discipline do they not hate. The kids that hate didn't learn anything, that's the problem.
Chris Rock