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Community college is like a disco with books: Here's ten dollars let me get my learn on!
Chris Rock
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Chris Rock
Age: 59
Born: 1965
Born: February 7
Comedian
Film Actor
Film Director
Film Producer
Screenwriter
Stand-Up Comedian
Television Actor
Television Presenter
Television Producer
Andrews
South Carolina
Cris Rock
Christopher Julius Rock III
Lil penny
Christopher Rock
Funny
Learn
Disco
Book
Ten
Like
Dollars
Humor
College
Books
Community
More quotes by Chris Rock
The two best things you can do for a person is have sex or make them laugh.
Chris Rock
The government doesn't want you to use YOUR drugs, they want you to use THEIR drugs.
Chris Rock
Comedians are the one who have to tell the emperor he has no clothes on.
Chris Rock
Don't argue! You cannot win, you cannot beat a woman in a arguement. It's impossble you will not win. Cause men, we are handicapped when it comes to arguing cause we have a need to make sense
Chris Rock
Hollywood's racist. Hollywood is sorority racist. It's like - we like you, Rhonda, but you're not a Kappa.
Chris Rock
America is the only place where people go hunting on a full stomach.
Chris Rock
When you become a comedian a lot of stuff that made you laugh before just stops. You stop watching your old cartoons you used to watch. You stop reading the funnies. It's like working at a strip club. You don't come home and turn on the Playboy Channel.
Chris Rock
There are people who would like to get rid of minimum wage. But we have to have it, because if we didn't some people would not get paid money. They would work all week for two loaves of bread and some Spam.
Chris Rock
That's a sure sign someone is going crazy - when he refers to himself in the third person, talks in low tones, and walks around wearing shades all day!
Chris Rock
I'll go with the guy with one house. The guy with one house is scared about losing his house.
Chris Rock
I've been married for 10 years and, you know, it's hard, you spruce it up and you go places. How do you spruce up anything? Artificially. You go places and do things.
Chris Rock
When you make comedy, you make it for the people and you try to have as many screenings and as many tests and you do focus groups and you read the cards and you try to give the people what they want in this comedy.
Chris Rock
My first year on 'SNL', I made $90,000 dollars.
Chris Rock
The thing I try to get across to the writers - and I do a lot of writing, too - is that when I do stand-up, nothing I talk about is funny. Everything is really sad and tragic and then I make it funny.
Chris Rock
Whenever I go out with other married couples, I like to bring along a single crackhead. Just to spice things up.
Chris Rock
Stop the violence! Can't we all just get along?
Chris Rock
You can never make a woman happy, it's impossible. I've never met a happy woman in my life. They're always complaining about something.
Chris Rock
A lot of racism going on in the world right now. Who's more racist? Black people or white people? Black people. You know why? 'Cuz we hate black people too! Everything white people don't like about black people, black people really don't like about black people.
Chris Rock
I don't write jokes first. I write down topics. I think of what I want to talk about, and then I write the jokes - they don't write me... And even if you don't think it's funny, you won't think it's boring. You might disagree, but you'll listen. And maybe even laugh as you disagree.
Chris Rock
When I hear people talk about juggling or the sacrifices they make for their children, I look at them like they're crazy because sacrifice infers that there was something better to do than the thing - than being with your children.
Chris Rock