Share
×
Inspirational Quotes
Authors
Professions
Topics
Tags
Quote
Two hours of sparkling entertainment spread out over a four-hour show.
Chris Rock
Share
Change background
T
T
T
Change font
Original
TAGS & TOPICS
Chris Rock
Age: 59
Born: 1965
Born: February 7
Comedian
Film Actor
Film Director
Film Producer
Screenwriter
Stand-Up Comedian
Television Actor
Television Presenter
Television Producer
Andrews
South Carolina
Cris Rock
Christopher Julius Rock III
Lil penny
Christopher Rock
Two
Spread
Hour
Humor
Four
Hours
Show
Funny
Sparkling
Shows
Entertainment
More quotes by Chris Rock
Karaoke isn't fair when you're a comedian. The whole idea is to get people laughing and enjoying themselves, and I'm a professional funny guy.
Chris Rock
It used to take years to become a junkie. But crack cut that down to 37 minutes.
Chris Rock
If a woman tells you she's twenty and looks sixteen, she's twelve. If she tells you she's twenty-six and looks twenty-six, she's damn near fourty.
Chris Rock
Men lie the most, women tell the biggest lies.
Chris Rock
Oprah is rich Bill Gates is wealthy. If Bill Gates woke up tomorrow with Oprah's money, he'd jump out of a window and slit his throat on the way down saying, 'I can't even put gas in my plane!'
Chris Rock
Gun control? We need bullet control! I think every bullet should cost 5,000 dollars. Because if a bullet cost five thousand dollar, we wouldn't have any innocent bystanders.
Chris Rock
My goal in life was to host the MTV Awards, because it's the awards show that Prince sang on, and that was the awards show that Eddie Murphy hosted and Arsenio hosted.
Chris Rock
A comedy club is a place where you work out material, you're trying material.
Chris Rock
I believe you got my property?
Chris Rock
Kids raised on a culture of “We’re not going to keep score in the game because we don’t want anybody to lose.” Or just ignoring race to a fault. You can’t say “the black kid over there.” No, it’s “the guy with the red shoes.” You can’t even be offensive on your way to being inoffensive.
Chris Rock
A black man will be elected President of the United States. I'm sorry, that's in the year 10,000.
Chris Rock
So, to say Barack Obama is progress is saying that he's the first black person that is qualified to be president. That's not black progress. That's white progress.
Chris Rock
Comedy is the blues for people who can’t sing.
Chris Rock
I've been married for 10 years and, you know, it's hard, you spruce it up and you go places. How do you spruce up anything? Artificially. You go places and do things.
Chris Rock
If you're the president you only have two jobs: peace and money.
Chris Rock
There's no interference in stand-up. It's all the things it's hard to get in film: I get to have a wife, I get to have kids. I get to be sexual. I get to grow. I get to be a man.
Chris Rock
That's a sure sign someone is going crazy - when he refers to himself in the third person, talks in low tones, and walks around wearing shades all day!
Chris Rock
If you want to prevent abortions, you make sure everyone has health care, a high school education and birth control. Not the exact opposite.
Chris Rock
If you wanna get away with murder, all you gotta do is shoot somebody in the head and put a demo tape in their pocket! 'This is a rap killing! Let's get outta here!'
Chris Rock
If a kid calls his grandma Mommy and his mama Pam, he's going to jail!
Chris Rock