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If you live below your means, you can turn down stuff all the time.
Chris Rock
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Chris Rock
Age: 59
Born: 1965
Born: February 7
Comedian
Film Actor
Film Director
Film Producer
Screenwriter
Stand-Up Comedian
Television Actor
Television Presenter
Television Producer
Andrews
South Carolina
Cris Rock
Christopher Julius Rock III
Lil penny
Christopher Rock
Turn
Turns
Means
Stuff
Live
Mean
Time
More quotes by Chris Rock
Anything you can suck at should make you nervous.
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Whenever I go out with other married couples, I like to bring along a single crackhead. Just to spice things up.
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Give me a black man, a white woman, a giraffe, a zebra anything but another white man! That last one f***ed up my roof!
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Just to be clear, Ray Rice was not fired for beating his wife. He was fired because a video of him beating his wife was released.
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Oprah is so rich, I saw John Kerry proposing to her.
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Hollywood's just not funny.
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You know those guys that go to the strip club at the daytime? If you're at a strip club, and the sun is out, you got some problems!
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You can write a great country record and still be angry. Who's angrier than Toby Keith? He's angrier than the average 10 rappers.
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You know, some people say life is short and that you could get hit by a bus at any moment and that you have to live each day like it's your last. Bullshit. Life is long. You're probably not gonna get hit by a bus. And you're gonna have to live with the choices you make for the next fifty years.
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I never watched the Oscars. Come on, it's a fashion show . . . What straight black man sits there and watches the Oscars? Show me one. And they don't recognize comedy, and you don't see a lot of black people nominated, so why should I watch it?
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Success is just hanging out with my kids. I mean, I always say if you have options, you're rich. To me, success is the fact that hey, I just did a movie and maybe I'll do some stand up, maybe I'll will write a book or maybe I will do a play.
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There are people who would like to get rid of minimum wage. But we have to have it, because if we didn't some people would not get paid money. They would work all week for two loaves of bread and some Spam.
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Why do people do yoga? To clear their minds? I embrace the clutter in my head.
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I'm an independent, but I got to admit I lean Democratic.
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Daddy pays for the water, daddy pays for the gas, daddy pays for the electricity, and if daddy didn't pay for the electricity, he'd pay for the candle on your nightstand, so you can study for the big test tomorrow.
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Gas is getting so expensive I'm gonna ride a mexican to work.
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I used to have horrible cars that would always end up broken down on the highway. When I tried to flag someone down, nobody stopped. But if I pushed my own car, other drivers would get out and push with me. If you want help, help yourself - people like to see that.
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God bless America. And no place else.
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I'll go with the guy with one house. The guy with one house is scared about losing his house.
Chris Rock
My movies are okay, but they're not my specials.
Chris Rock