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That's a sure sign someone is going crazy - when he refers to himself in the third person, talks in low tones, and walks around wearing shades all day!

Chris Rock

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Chris Rock
Age: 59
Born: 1965
Born: February 7
Comedian
Film Actor
Film Director
Film Producer
Screenwriter
Stand-Up Comedian
Television Actor
Television Presenter
Television Producer
Andrews
South Carolina
Cris Rock
Christopher Julius Rock III
Lil penny
Christopher Rock
Someone
Tone
Around
Third
Persons
Thirds
Refers
Person
Sign
Tones
Going
Lows
Shades
Walks
Talks
Crazy
Shade
Sure
Wearing

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I'll go with the guy with one house. The guy with one house is scared about losing his house.
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Men lie the most. Men lie all the time.
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Kids raised on a culture of “We’re not going to keep score in the game because we don’t want anybody to lose.” Or just ignoring race to a fault. You can’t say “the black kid over there.” No, it’s “the guy with the red shoes.” You can’t even be offensive on your way to being inoffensive.
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People are always going to, you know, find something wrong with people who are not the exact same as them. That's just what it is. Black, white, short, tall, religions, whatever. People are bad.
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I live in a neighborhood so bad that you can get shot while getting shot.
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You don't pay taxes they take them from your check. That's not a payment - that's a 'jack.
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You don't need a critic to tell you people aren't laughing.
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Before I was a comedian, I thought the coolest thing that would happen to me was being a teenager... Boy, was I wrong!
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You know, some people say life is short and that you could get hit by a bus at any moment and that you have to live each day like it's your last. Bullshit. Life is long. You're probably not gonna get hit by a bus. And you're gonna have to live with the choices you make for the next fifty years.
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You cannot win in a fight against women, cause men have a need to make sense
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I never really write the jokes. I just sit down over a week or two and try to figure out what I want to talk about. Once I narrow that down, then I start working on the material, like How do I make this stuff funny?
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I think it's better to have ideas.
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Whatever your woman is into, you better be into. Whatever your man is into, you better be N2. Your partner into church, you better be into church. Your man or woman a crack head, you better be a crack head ... Otherwise it just won't work.
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Gas is getting so expensive I'm gonna ride a mexican to work.
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Anything you can suck at should make you nervous.
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I'm in show business... I want to hang out with Janet Jackson, not Jesse Jackson.
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Hollywood's racist. Hollywood is sorority racist. It's like - we like you, Rhonda, but you're not a Kappa.
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When a musical act performs, the black audience goes crazy for all the stuff, the album cuts, everything. White audiences, they're nice and all, but they're not going to lose it until they get the hits. Comedy is the same thing.
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All people naturally hate. My kid bites people now. I didn't teach my kid to bite anybody. Kids say mean stuff. Only through love do we get this evil out of them. Only through love and structure and discipline do they not hate. The kids that hate didn't learn anything, that's the problem.
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My mother is the kind of woman you don't want to be in line behind at the supermarket. She has coupons for coupons.
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