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If you're the president you only have two jobs: peace and money.
Chris Rock
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Chris Rock
Age: 59
Born: 1965
Born: February 7
Comedian
Film Actor
Film Director
Film Producer
Screenwriter
Stand-Up Comedian
Television Actor
Television Presenter
Television Producer
Andrews
South Carolina
Cris Rock
Christopher Julius Rock III
Lil penny
Christopher Rock
Peace
President
Jobs
Money
Two
More quotes by Chris Rock
Happy white peoples independence day the slaves weren't free but I'm sure they enjoyed fireworks.
Chris Rock
The key to staying together is making sure you guys like each other and need each other.
Chris Rock
I mean no disrespect to anything I did before.
Chris Rock
Success is just hanging out with my kids. I mean, I always say if you have options, you're rich. To me, success is the fact that hey, I just did a movie and maybe I'll do some stand up, maybe I'll will write a book or maybe I will do a play.
Chris Rock
You can write a great country record and still be angry. Who's angrier than Toby Keith? He's angrier than the average 10 rappers.
Chris Rock
That's a sure sign someone is going crazy - when he refers to himself in the third person, talks in low tones, and walks around wearing shades all day!
Chris Rock
Kids always act up the most before they go to sleep.
Chris Rock
A black man will be elected President of the United States. I'm sorry, that's in the year 10,000.
Chris Rock
There's always a moment in any stand-up show I do where people are booing. They kinda boo a premise. And then I bail myself out with a joke. But it's like trying to do movies where there's a dramatic undertone.
Chris Rock
People are always going to, you know, find something wrong with people who are not the exact same as them. That's just what it is. Black, white, short, tall, religions, whatever. People are bad.
Chris Rock
I'm a nerd. I'm a little guy... the last guy you'd expect in a romantic movie.
Chris Rock
I can't cook, but I have a nice book of menus... and I can plate and set the table.
Chris Rock
I don't need a president with a bucket list!
Chris Rock
If Bill Gates woke up with Oprah's money he'd jump out the window.
Chris Rock
Kids raised on a culture of “We’re not going to keep score in the game because we don’t want anybody to lose.” Or just ignoring race to a fault. You can’t say “the black kid over there.” No, it’s “the guy with the red shoes.” You can’t even be offensive on your way to being inoffensive.
Chris Rock
So, to say Barack Obama is progress is saying that he's the first black person that is qualified to be president. That's not black progress. That's white progress.
Chris Rock
Smart is knowing if you're dumb. Knowing when to shut up and to listen to people that are smarter than you.
Chris Rock
You don't need a critic to tell you people aren't laughing.
Chris Rock
Oprah is rich Bill Gates is wealthy. If Bill Gates woke up tomorrow with Oprah's money, he'd jump out of a window and slit his throat on the way down saying, 'I can't even put gas in my plane!'
Chris Rock
I know what you're thinking: why is Chris Rock bagging groceries? But I dropped out of high school in the tenth grade, so if I couldn't tell jokes this is exactly what I'd be doing.
Chris Rock
