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I never really write the jokes. I just sit down over a week or two and try to figure out what I want to talk about. Once I narrow that down, then I start working on the material, like How do I make this stuff funny?
Chris Rock
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Chris Rock
Age: 59
Born: 1965
Born: February 7
Comedian
Film Actor
Film Director
Film Producer
Screenwriter
Stand-Up Comedian
Television Actor
Television Presenter
Television Producer
Andrews
South Carolina
Cris Rock
Christopher Julius Rock III
Lil penny
Christopher Rock
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Week
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Start
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Talk
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More quotes by Chris Rock
A lot of racism going on in the world right now. Who's more racist? Black people or white people? Black people. You know why? 'Cuz we hate black people too! Everything white people don't like about black people, black people really don't like about black people.
Chris Rock
I have four jackets, five pants, whatever, that are all the same. If you see U2 in concert, they wear the same thing every night. They just got a bunch of them. Albert Einstein used to wear brown suits every day. Why waste brainpower on something that is trivial?
Chris Rock
All people naturally hate. My kid bites people now. I didn't teach my kid to bite anybody. Kids say mean stuff. Only through love do we get this evil out of them. Only through love and structure and discipline do they not hate. The kids that hate didn't learn anything, that's the problem.
Chris Rock
Early in my career it was very important that I gain the reputation. I haven't been on the road in two or three years, but when I say tickets are on sale, I know they're going to be gone, even if my movie bombed or my TV show sucked.
Chris Rock
Dude, I didn't say Jude Law can't act. I didn't say Jude Law was in bad movies. I just said he's in every movie.
Chris Rock
The thing about Barack Obama, just from being around him, is he's cooler than the other politicians, but just nerdy enough to do the job. Like you can't be really cool and be the president.
Chris Rock
Wealth is not about having a lot of money it's about having a lot of options.
Chris Rock
There's a difference between racism and I don't know any better. I'm clueless. Racism is like, I'm trying to make you feel bad. That's racism.
Chris Rock
Give me a black man, a white woman, a giraffe, a zebra anything but another white man! That last one f***ed up my roof!
Chris Rock
If Bill Gates woke up with Oprah's money he'd jump out the window.
Chris Rock
You can never make a woman happy, it's impossible. I've never met a happy woman in my life. They're always complaining about something.
Chris Rock
In the world of animation, you can be anything you wanna be. If you're a fat woman, you can play a skinny princess. If you're short wimpy guy, you can play a tall gladiator. If you're a white man, you can play an Arabian prince. And if you're a black man, you can play a donkey or a zebra.
Chris Rock
Just to be clear, Ray Rice was not fired for beating his wife. He was fired because a video of him beating his wife was released.
Chris Rock
Right now, my job is that I'm like an ambulance chaser. I've got to look for movies with white guys falling out of them.
Chris Rock
Money is the best lotion in the world.
Chris Rock
I mean no disrespect to anything I did before.
Chris Rock
I love having somebody there - that companion thing. You know who you're going to eat with, who you're going to see a movie with.
Chris Rock
I live in a neighborhood so bad that you can get shot while getting shot.
Chris Rock
A white boy that makes C's in college can make it to the White House.
Chris Rock
I was at Michael Jackson's house, and this kid runs out, 'Wait, save me!'
Chris Rock