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Give me a black man, a white woman, a giraffe, a zebra anything but another white man! That last one f***ed up my roof!
Chris Rock
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Chris Rock
Age: 59
Born: 1965
Born: February 7
Comedian
Film Actor
Film Director
Film Producer
Screenwriter
Stand-Up Comedian
Television Actor
Television Presenter
Television Producer
Andrews
South Carolina
Cris Rock
Christopher Julius Rock III
Lil penny
Christopher Rock
White
Black
Zebra
Another
Zebras
Give
Giraffe
Anything
Roof
Giving
Lasts
Men
Last
Woman
More quotes by Chris Rock
I don't get high, but sometimes I wish I did. That way, when I messed up in life I would have an excuse. But right now there's no rehab for stupidity.
Chris Rock
Stop the violence! Can't we all just get along?
Chris Rock
Here's the thing. When we talk about race relations in America or racial progress, it's all nonsense. There are no race relations. White people were crazy. Now they're not as crazy. To say that black people have made progress would be to say they deserve what happened to them before.
Chris Rock
I can't cook, but I have a nice book of menus... and I can plate and set the table.
Chris Rock
I do what I can do when I can do it.
Chris Rock
You know, some people say life is short and that you could get hit by a bus at any moment and that you have to live each day like it's your last. Bullshit. Life is long. You're probably not gonna get hit by a bus. And you're gonna have to live with the choices you make for the next fifty years.
Chris Rock
Happy white peoples independence day the slaves weren't free but I'm sure they enjoyed fireworks.
Chris Rock
If Bill Gates woke up with Oprah's money he'd jump out the window.
Chris Rock
I'm an independent, but I got to admit I lean Democratic.
Chris Rock
My mother is the kind of woman you don't want to be in line behind at the supermarket. She has coupons for coupons.
Chris Rock
Comedy is a group activity, a verbal orgy.
Chris Rock
I love my life, but I don't think I'm any happier than my younger brother Andre, who drives a garbage truck.
Chris Rock
Anything you can suck at should make you nervous.
Chris Rock
If you're black, you got to look at America a little bit different. You got to look at America like the uncle who paid for you to go to college, but who molested you.
Chris Rock
When you've been on a ghetto diet your entire life, you're just happy to get a large soda instead of a medium.
Chris Rock
Babies don't know who's rich and who's poor. You love 'em and they're happy.
Chris Rock
The government doesn't want you to use YOUR drugs, they want you to use THEIR drugs.
Chris Rock
Sometimes people offer you plays, they offer you parts, but they only offer it because I'm famous.
Chris Rock
A man is only as faithful as his options.
Chris Rock
The material comes from whenever you realize that you and someone else have something in common. So any conversation you've had more than once, anything you see happening to you that you see happening to a friend, you go, Hmmm, that's a situation I can make funny.
Chris Rock