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Oprah is so rich, I saw John Kerry proposing to her.
Chris Rock
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Chris Rock
Age: 59
Born: 1965
Born: February 7
Comedian
Film Actor
Film Director
Film Producer
Screenwriter
Stand-Up Comedian
Television Actor
Television Presenter
Television Producer
Andrews
South Carolina
Cris Rock
Christopher Julius Rock III
Lil penny
Christopher Rock
Saws
Rich
Politics
Proposing
Kerry
John
More quotes by Chris Rock
If poor people knew how rich rich people are, there would be riots in the streets.
Chris Rock
When you're doing a big-budget movie and you're four on the call sheet, you've got a lot of free time.
Chris Rock
Before I was a comedian, I thought the coolest thing that would happen to me was being a teenager... Boy, was I wrong!
Chris Rock
I never watched the Oscars. Come on, it's a fashion show . . . What straight black man sits there and watches the Oscars? Show me one. And they don't recognize comedy, and you don't see a lot of black people nominated, so why should I watch it?
Chris Rock
My movies are okay, but they're not my specials.
Chris Rock
You can only offend me if you mean something to me.
Chris Rock
I'll go with the guy with one house. The guy with one house is scared about losing his house.
Chris Rock
Black people have been qualified to be president for hundreds of years. George Washington Carver could have been president. I could go on with a list of black men that were qualified to be the president of the United States. So the Obama victory is progress for white people.
Chris Rock
Gun control? We need bullet control! I think every bullet should cost 5,000 dollars. Because if a bullet cost five thousand dollar, we wouldn't have any innocent bystanders.
Chris Rock
I'm in show business... I want to hang out with Janet Jackson, not Jesse Jackson.
Chris Rock
Kids always act up the most before they go to sleep.
Chris Rock
I'm like the Hulk on stage. It's way over the top. That's Bizarro Chris. Sometimes I get off stage and go What did I say?! I'll watch one of my stand-up specials a year later and go Eww, that was mean.
Chris Rock
There's no interference in stand-up. It's all the things it's hard to get in film: I get to have a wife, I get to have kids. I get to be sexual. I get to grow. I get to be a man.
Chris Rock
You could be married and bored or single and lonely. Ain't no happiness nowhere.
Chris Rock
When you have kids, there's no such thing as quality time. There's just time. There's no, 'Ooh, his graduation's better than going to the mall.' It's all kind of equal. Changing her diaper and her winning a contest - it's all good.
Chris Rock
You only know that you're smart because you're around dumb people from time to time!
Chris Rock
My first year on 'SNL', I made $90,000 dollars.
Chris Rock
If you live with a single parent, you don't see compromise. You witness a grown person living in a world where they do what they want to do. When you are raised by two parents, you are constantly watching compromise take place. Just by observing that, it made me a better person.
Chris Rock
I never really write the jokes. I just sit down over a week or two and try to figure out what I want to talk about. Once I narrow that down, then I start working on the material, like How do I make this stuff funny?
Chris Rock
Eddie Murphy is to comedians what Nicki Minaj is to Spanx.
Chris Rock