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We were so poor my daddy unplugged the clocks when we went to bed.

Chris Rock

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Chris Rock
Age: 59
Born: 1965
Born: February 7
Comedian
Film Actor
Film Director
Film Producer
Screenwriter
Stand-Up Comedian
Television Actor
Television Presenter
Television Producer
Andrews
South Carolina
Cris Rock
Christopher Julius Rock III
Lil penny
Christopher Rock
Clocks
Daddy
Clock
Bed
Went
Poor
Unplugged

More quotes by Chris Rock

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Comedians are the one who have to tell the emperor he has no clothes on.
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The only plan I have is to not do anything I don't want to do - and to never work just for money.
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I used to have horrible cars that would always end up broken down on the highway. When I tried to flag someone down, nobody stopped. But if I pushed my own car, other drivers would get out and push with me. If you want help, help yourself - people like to see that.
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Only a woman can make you feel wrong for doing something right.
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Don't argue! You cannot win, you cannot beat a woman in a arguement. It's impossble you will not win. Cause men, we are handicapped when it comes to arguing cause we have a need to make sense
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If you’re a black Christian, you have a real short memory.
Chris Rock
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Whatever your woman is into, you better be into. Whatever your man is into, you better be N2. Your partner into church, you better be into church. Your man or woman a crack head, you better be a crack head ... Otherwise it just won't work.
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Kids always act up the most before they go to sleep.
Chris Rock
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I hate niggas! I hate em! I wish they'd let me join the Ku Klux Klan!
Chris Rock
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If you wanna get away with murder, all you gotta do is shoot somebody in the head and put a demo tape in their pocket! 'This is a rap killing! Let's get outta here!'
Chris Rock
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Just to be clear, Ray Rice was not fired for beating his wife. He was fired because a video of him beating his wife was released.
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My first year on 'SNL', I made $90,000 dollars.
Chris Rock
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I love black people, but I hate niggers.
Chris Rock
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I know what you're thinking: why is Chris Rock bagging groceries? But I dropped out of high school in the tenth grade, so if I couldn't tell jokes this is exactly what I'd be doing.
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I'm a rap comedian the same way Bill Cosby is a jazz comedian, Cosby's laid back. I'm like, bang, bang bang, right into it.
Chris Rock
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Bill Cosby was the first comedian I was exposed to, because he doesn't curse.
Chris Rock
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You don’t need no gun control, you know what you need? We need some bullet control. Men, we need to control the bullets, that’s right. I think all bullets should cost five thousand dollars… five thousand dollars per bullet… You know why? Cause if a bullet cost five thousand dollars there would be no more innocent bystanders.
Chris Rock
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Who's judging American Idol? Paula Abdul? Paula Abdul judging a singing contest is like Christopher Reeve judging a dance contest!
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I've been married for 10 years and, you know, it's hard, you spruce it up and you go places. How do you spruce up anything? Artificially. You go places and do things.
Chris Rock
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Men are handicapped when it comes to arguing, 'cause we have a need to make sense.
Chris Rock