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No matter what kind of backgrounds two men are from, if you go, 'Hey, man, women are crazy,' you've got a friend.

Chris Rock

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Chris Rock
Age: 59
Born: 1965
Born: February 7
Comedian
Film Actor
Film Director
Film Producer
Screenwriter
Stand-Up Comedian
Television Actor
Television Presenter
Television Producer
Andrews
South Carolina
Cris Rock
Christopher Julius Rock III
Lil penny
Christopher Rock
Women
Matter
Kind
Men
Hey
Backgrounds
Friend
Crazy
Two

More quotes by Chris Rock

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Are we so desperate for entertainment that we will fall for a Trickless magician?? Saw a woman in half. Pull a rabbit out of a hat. Do something! What tricks does this guy have? I'm in a box...and I ain't gonna eat.. I'm in a box... and I ain't gonna eat!! That ain't no trick! That's called living in the projects!
Chris Rock
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I think all the funny people were bullied. When they talk about outlawing bullying, it's like, what? You want no Comedy Central?
Chris Rock
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Here's the thing. When we talk about race relations in America or racial progress, it's all nonsense. There are no race relations. White people were crazy. Now they're not as crazy. To say that black people have made progress would be to say they deserve what happened to them before.
Chris Rock
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Only a woman can make you feel wrong for doing something right.
Chris Rock
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I never watched the Oscars. Come on, it's a fashion show . . . What straight black man sits there and watches the Oscars? Show me one. And they don't recognize comedy, and you don't see a lot of black people nominated, so why should I watch it?
Chris Rock
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I hate niggas! I hate em! I wish they'd let me join the Ku Klux Klan!
Chris Rock
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A man is only as faithful as his options.
Chris Rock
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Whatever your woman is into, you better be into. Whatever your man is into, you better be N2. Your partner into church, you better be into church. Your man or woman a crack head, you better be a crack head ... Otherwise it just won't work.
Chris Rock
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Every man has to settle down eventually. You know why you gotta settle down eventually? Because you don't want to be the old guy in the club. You know what I'm talking about. Every club you go into, there's always some old guy. He ain't really old, just a little too old to be in the club.
Chris Rock
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Gas is getting so expensive I'm gonna ride a mexican to work.
Chris Rock
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Every comedian has a moment in his life when he realizes he's a little bit different from everyone else. It's like being the only guy in a movie who sees the ghost. The ghost talks to you and you talk to him. Then you turn to your friend and say, Hey. Do you see that ghost? And he says, What ghost?
Chris Rock
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We got no wealthy black people. We got rich people. Shaq is rich. The guy who signs his checks is wealthy.
Chris Rock
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The U.S government hates rap music
Chris Rock
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Two hours of sparkling entertainment spread out over a four-hour show.
Chris Rock
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There's always a moment in any stand-up show I do where people are booing. They kinda boo a premise. And then I bail myself out with a joke. But it's like trying to do movies where there's a dramatic undertone.
Chris Rock
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If a woman tells you she's twenty and looks sixteen, she's twelve. If she tells you she's twenty-six and looks twenty-six, she's damn near fourty.
Chris Rock
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You can write a great country record and still be angry. Who's angrier than Toby Keith? He's angrier than the average 10 rappers.
Chris Rock
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Daddy pays for the water, daddy pays for the gas, daddy pays for the electricity, and if daddy didn't pay for the electricity, he'd pay for the candle on your nightstand, so you can study for the big test tomorrow.
Chris Rock
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Everything's funny - in the right context and done by the right person.
Chris Rock
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Artistically I'm curious. But in life? No. I can go to a restaurant and order the same thing for 10 years.
Chris Rock