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Gas is getting so expensive I'm gonna ride a mexican to work.

Chris Rock

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Chris Rock
Age: 59
Born: 1965
Born: February 7
Comedian
Film Actor
Film Director
Film Producer
Screenwriter
Stand-Up Comedian
Television Actor
Television Presenter
Television Producer
Andrews
South Carolina
Cris Rock
Christopher Julius Rock III
Lil penny
Christopher Rock
Ride
Expensive
Gonna
Getting
Funny
Work
Epic
Mexican
Gas

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If you properly clean a room, it gets dirtier before it gets cleaner.
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I'll go with the guy with one house. The guy with one house is scared about losing his house.
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When you've been on a ghetto diet your entire life, you're just happy to get a large soda instead of a medium.
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The thing I try to get across to the writers - and I do a lot of writing, too - is that when I do stand-up, nothing I talk about is funny. Everything is really sad and tragic and then I make it funny.
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Black comics, they only watch Black comedians. You're a comedian you're not just a Black comedian. You're a comedian. I try to get that through to everybody.
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Black people dominate sports in the United States. 20% of the population and 90% of the final four.
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God bless America. And no place else.
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I just thought everybody lived around abandoned buildings and crack-heads, ... I lived in the ghetto until I was like 19. I came to Los Angeles, stayed at hotels and stuff. When I got back and I saw what my neighborhood looked like, I started getting scared.
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Kids raised on a culture of “We’re not going to keep score in the game because we don’t want anybody to lose.” Or just ignoring race to a fault. You can’t say “the black kid over there.” No, it’s “the guy with the red shoes.” You can’t even be offensive on your way to being inoffensive.
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When you become a comedian a lot of stuff that made you laugh before just stops. You stop watching your old cartoons you used to watch. You stop reading the funnies. It's like working at a strip club. You don't come home and turn on the Playboy Channel.
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I don't need a president with a bucket list!
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No, I want big ol' titties in my face!
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Sometimes people offer you plays, they offer you parts, but they only offer it because I'm famous.
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I always say about my daughters, they save me from my miserable self. They take me out, you know, a comedian, you could live in your head a lot. And you're writing and you're doubting. But when I'm with my kids and my family, it's all about them.
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I'm pretty good at getting over people throwing stuff at me. If you've been doing stand up long enough you know how to swing back and get the laughs.
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I love my life, but I don't think I'm any happier than my younger brother Andre, who drives a garbage truck.
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You can only offend me if you mean something to me.
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I think it's better to have ideas.
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Stop the violence! Can't we all just get along?
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Stand-up is the only career like that where once you get really big at it, people kind of encourage you not to do it.
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