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Oprah is rich Bill Gates is wealthy. If Bill Gates woke up tomorrow with Oprah's money, he'd jump out of a window and slit his throat on the way down saying, 'I can't even put gas in my plane!'
Chris Rock
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Chris Rock
Age: 59
Born: 1965
Born: February 7
Comedian
Film Actor
Film Director
Film Producer
Screenwriter
Stand-Up Comedian
Television Actor
Television Presenter
Television Producer
Andrews
South Carolina
Cris Rock
Christopher Julius Rock III
Lil penny
Christopher Rock
Window
Plane
Tomorrow
Jump
Saying
Gates
Rich
Wealthy
Money
Throat
Slit
Even
Planes
Slits
Way
Bill
Woke
Bills
Gas
More quotes by Chris Rock
When I do something good, the audience lets me know immediately. They laugh. That's it.
Chris Rock
Sometimes people offer you plays, they offer you parts, but they only offer it because I'm famous.
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If you properly clean a room, it gets dirtier before it gets cleaner.
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I see guys who can't make 10 percent of what I make, and yet they have four Bentleys, three houses, and four bodyguards.
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There's a difference between racism and I don't know any better. I'm clueless. Racism is like, I'm trying to make you feel bad. That's racism.
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When you're making a real documentary, you shoot it and the movie happens. You don't make - this sounds corny - you don't make a documentary, a documentary makes you. It really does.
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America is the greatest country in the whole world.
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Men lie the most. Men lie all the time.
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Right now, my job is that I'm like an ambulance chaser. I've got to look for movies with white guys falling out of them.
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I'm severely overrated. I'm just above a hack.
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I've been married for 10 years and, you know, it's hard, you spruce it up and you go places. How do you spruce up anything? Artificially. You go places and do things.
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Unlike flying or astral projection, walking through walls is an earthbound pursuit.
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I'm happy if everybody else is. I'm a big brother, the oldest. If you're happy and I'm not, I'm cool with that. If I'm happy and you're not, I'm sad.
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Everyone has favorite criminals. Mine are pimps. We can all rob a bank we can all sell drugs. Being a pimp is a whole other thing.
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I'm in show business... I want to hang out with Janet Jackson, not Jesse Jackson.
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You don't need a critic to tell you people aren't laughing.
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If you're the president you only have two jobs: peace and money.
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I never watched the Oscars. Come on, it's a fashion show . . . What straight black man sits there and watches the Oscars? Show me one. And they don't recognize comedy, and you don't see a lot of black people nominated, so why should I watch it?
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An entertainer's reputation as a live act is the most valuable thing he or she can have. If people know you give good shows, you'll never be broke for the rest of your life.
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In the world of animation, you can be anything you wanna be. If you're a fat woman, you can play a skinny princess. If you're short wimpy guy, you can play a tall gladiator. If you're a white man, you can play an Arabian prince. And if you're a black man, you can play a donkey or a zebra.
Chris Rock
