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You cannot win in a fight against women, cause men have a need to make sense
Chris Rock
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Chris Rock
Age: 59
Born: 1965
Born: February 7
Comedian
Film Actor
Film Director
Film Producer
Screenwriter
Stand-Up Comedian
Television Actor
Television Presenter
Television Producer
Andrews
South Carolina
Cris Rock
Christopher Julius Rock III
Lil penny
Christopher Rock
Make
Causes
Men
Winning
Fighting
Sense
Cannot
Women
Need
Cause
Needs
Fight
More quotes by Chris Rock
Everything's funny - in the right context and done by the right person.
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I love my life, but I don't think I'm any happier than my younger brother Andre, who drives a garbage truck.
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It's weird with stand-up comedy. It doesn't really translate worldwide. I want to figure out how do I make it worldwide. Do a special in Africa. Can't beat that. Pull that off, then I will have done something.
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I don't get high, but sometimes I wish I did. That way, when I messed up in life I would have an excuse. But right now there's no rehab for stupidity.
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The government doesn't want you to use YOUR drugs, they want you to use THEIR drugs.
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So there's a cloud of rage around me, but being an artist kind of changes that. No matter what you thought coming in, what ignorant thing you believed, you're in show business for two years, you're like, OK, I was wrong. It's hard to be mad at any particular group of people when you're an artist.
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I believe you got my property?
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Why do people do yoga? To clear their minds? I embrace the clutter in my head.
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I don't write jokes first. I write down topics. I think of what I want to talk about, and then I write the jokes - they don't write me... And even if you don't think it's funny, you won't think it's boring. You might disagree, but you'll listen. And maybe even laugh as you disagree.
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The U.S government hates rap music
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Whoever you hate will end up in your family. You don't like gays? You're gonna have a gay son. You don't like Puerto Ricans? Your daughter's gonna come home with Livin' La Vida Loca!
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America is the greatest country in the whole world.
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I never had the confidence to say I was going to be in front of the camera as a comedian until I saw Eddie Murphy years later.
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I just thought everybody lived around abandoned buildings and crack-heads, ... I lived in the ghetto until I was like 19. I came to Los Angeles, stayed at hotels and stuff. When I got back and I saw what my neighborhood looked like, I started getting scared.
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Every man has to settle down eventually. You know why you gotta settle down eventually? Because you don't want to be the old guy in the club. You know what I'm talking about. Every club you go into, there's always some old guy. He ain't really old, just a little too old to be in the club.
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I'll probably pay more attention to the musicians in the pit than the stars because they're the closest you're going to get to normal people in the audience.
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Money is the best lotion in the world.
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I can't cook, but I have a nice book of menus... and I can plate and set the table.
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Anything you can suck at should make you nervous.
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I love black people, but I hate niggers.
Chris Rock