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Welcome to the 77th and last Oscars.

Chris Rock

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Chris Rock
Age: 59
Born: 1965
Born: February 7
Comedian
Film Actor
Film Director
Film Producer
Screenwriter
Stand-Up Comedian
Television Actor
Television Presenter
Television Producer
Andrews
South Carolina
Cris Rock
Christopher Julius Rock III
Lil penny
Christopher Rock
Oscars
Welcome
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More quotes by Chris Rock

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Men are handicapped when it comes to arguing, 'cause we have a need to make sense.
Chris Rock
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The two best things you can do for a person is have sex or make them laugh.
Chris Rock
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If you want to prevent abortions, you make sure everyone has health care, a high school education and birth control. Not the exact opposite.
Chris Rock
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Are we so desperate for entertainment that we will fall for a Trickless magician?? Saw a woman in half. Pull a rabbit out of a hat. Do something! What tricks does this guy have? I'm in a box...and I ain't gonna eat.. I'm in a box... and I ain't gonna eat!! That ain't no trick! That's called living in the projects!
Chris Rock
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I was at Michael Jackson's house, and this kid runs out, 'Wait, save me!'
Chris Rock
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I'll probably pay more attention to the musicians in the pit than the stars because they're the closest you're going to get to normal people in the audience.
Chris Rock
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I always say about my daughters, they save me from my miserable self. They take me out, you know, a comedian, you could live in your head a lot. And you're writing and you're doubting. But when I'm with my kids and my family, it's all about them.
Chris Rock
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Yeah, it's unfair that you can get judged by something you didn't do, but it's also unfair that you can inherit money that you didn't work for.
Chris Rock
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Men lie the most, women tell the biggest lies.
Chris Rock
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Oprah is so rich, I saw John Kerry proposing to her.
Chris Rock
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I'm a rap comedian the same way Bill Cosby is a jazz comedian, Cosby's laid back. I'm like, bang, bang bang, right into it.
Chris Rock
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My goal in life was to host the MTV Awards, because it's the awards show that Prince sang on, and that was the awards show that Eddie Murphy hosted and Arsenio hosted.
Chris Rock
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I can't cook, but I have a nice book of menus... and I can plate and set the table.
Chris Rock
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Oprah is rich Bill Gates is wealthy. If Bill Gates woke up tomorrow with Oprah's money, he'd jump out of a window and slit his throat on the way down saying, 'I can't even put gas in my plane!'
Chris Rock
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In the world of animation, you can be anything you wanna be. If you're a fat woman, you can play a skinny princess. If you're short wimpy guy, you can play a tall gladiator. If you're a white man, you can play an Arabian prince. And if you're a black man, you can play a donkey or a zebra.
Chris Rock
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My dad worked every day. I didn't get into show business to work every day. So the fact that most days I get to like, spend really good time with my kids - that's what success is to me.
Chris Rock
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I love having somebody there - that companion thing. You know who you're going to eat with, who you're going to see a movie with.
Chris Rock
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Eddie Murphy is to comedians what Nicki Minaj is to Spanx.
Chris Rock
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Comedy is a group activity, a verbal orgy.
Chris Rock
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I'm pretty good at getting over people throwing stuff at me. If you've been doing stand up long enough you know how to swing back and get the laughs.
Chris Rock