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Karaoke isn't fair when you're a comedian. The whole idea is to get people laughing and enjoying themselves, and I'm a professional funny guy.
Chris Rock
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Chris Rock
Age: 59
Born: 1965
Born: February 7
Comedian
Film Actor
Film Director
Film Producer
Screenwriter
Stand-Up Comedian
Television Actor
Television Presenter
Television Producer
Andrews
South Carolina
Cris Rock
Christopher Julius Rock III
Lil penny
Christopher Rock
People
Fair
Laughing
Guy
Funny
Karaoke
Enjoy
Enjoying
Idea
Comedian
Ideas
Professional
Whole
Fairs
More quotes by Chris Rock
The thing about Barack Obama, just from being around him, is he's cooler than the other politicians, but just nerdy enough to do the job. Like you can't be really cool and be the president.
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If a kid calls his grandma Mommy and his mama Pam, he's going to jail!
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You don't pay taxes they take them from your check. That's not a payment - that's a 'jack.
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Hollywood's just not funny.
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Unlike flying or astral projection, walking through walls is an earthbound pursuit.
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If you wanna get away with murder, all you gotta do is shoot somebody in the head and put a demo tape in their pocket! 'This is a rap killing! Let's get outta here!'
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Comedy is a group activity, a verbal orgy.
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An entertainer's reputation as a live act is the most valuable thing he or she can have. If people know you give good shows, you'll never be broke for the rest of your life.
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I think it's better to have ideas.
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Daddy pays for the water, daddy pays for the gas, daddy pays for the electricity, and if daddy didn't pay for the electricity, he'd pay for the candle on your nightstand, so you can study for the big test tomorrow.
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Oprah is so rich, I saw John Kerry proposing to her.
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If you want to prevent abortions, you make sure everyone has health care, a high school education and birth control. Not the exact opposite.
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When you make drama you are like Picasso. Drama is whatever you want it to be.
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When you make comedy, you make it for the people and you try to have as many screenings and as many tests and you do focus groups and you read the cards and you try to give the people what they want in this comedy.
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Yeah, it's unfair that you can get judged by something you didn't do, but it's also unfair that you can inherit money that you didn't work for.
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If you're the president you only have two jobs: peace and money.
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Babies don't know who's rich and who's poor. You love 'em and they're happy.
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I always say about my daughters, they save me from my miserable self. They take me out, you know, a comedian, you could live in your head a lot. And you're writing and you're doubting. But when I'm with my kids and my family, it's all about them.
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I'm in show business... I want to hang out with Janet Jackson, not Jesse Jackson.
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You only know that you're smart because you're around dumb people from time to time!
Chris Rock