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Bill Cosby was the first comedian I was exposed to, because he doesn't curse.
Chris Rock
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Chris Rock
Age: 59
Born: 1965
Born: February 7
Comedian
Film Actor
Film Director
Film Producer
Screenwriter
Stand-Up Comedian
Television Actor
Television Presenter
Television Producer
Andrews
South Carolina
Cris Rock
Christopher Julius Rock III
Lil penny
Christopher Rock
Exposed
Comedian
Curse
Bill
Bills
Doesn
Firsts
First
More quotes by Chris Rock
If you wanna get away with murder, all you gotta do is shoot somebody in the head and put a demo tape in their pocket! 'This is a rap killing! Let's get outta here!'
Chris Rock
A white boy that makes C's in college can make it to the White House.
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The U.S government hates rap music
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Only married people understand you can be miserable and happy at the same time.
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No, I want big ol' titties in my face!
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Smart is knowing if you're dumb. Knowing when to shut up and to listen to people that are smarter than you.
Chris Rock
I'm happy if everybody else is. I'm a big brother, the oldest. If you're happy and I'm not, I'm cool with that. If I'm happy and you're not, I'm sad.
Chris Rock
I don't write jokes first. I write down topics. I think of what I want to talk about, and then I write the jokes - they don't write me... And even if you don't think it's funny, you won't think it's boring. You might disagree, but you'll listen. And maybe even laugh as you disagree.
Chris Rock
Money is the best lotion in the world.
Chris Rock
I see as white people finding loopholes in the slavery laws.
Chris Rock
Comedy is the blues for people who can’t sing.
Chris Rock
The key to staying together is making sure you guys like each other and need each other.
Chris Rock
You know, some people say life is short and that you could get hit by a bus at any moment and that you have to live each day like it's your last. Bullshit. Life is long. You're probably not gonna get hit by a bus. And you're gonna have to live with the choices you make for the next fifty years.
Chris Rock
My first year on 'SNL', I made $90,000 dollars.
Chris Rock
Eddie Murphy is to comedians what Nicki Minaj is to Spanx.
Chris Rock
I've seen women who don't have great relationships with their dads, and it all comes down to this: You have to tell girls you love them every day.
Chris Rock
I was at Michael Jackson's house, and this kid runs out, 'Wait, save me!'
Chris Rock
Only dumb people try to impress smart people. Smart people just do what they do.
Chris Rock
I do what I can do when I can do it.
Chris Rock
Are we so desperate for entertainment that we will fall for a Trickless magician?? Saw a woman in half. Pull a rabbit out of a hat. Do something! What tricks does this guy have? I'm in a box...and I ain't gonna eat.. I'm in a box... and I ain't gonna eat!! That ain't no trick! That's called living in the projects!
Chris Rock