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Who's judging American Idol? Paula Abdul? Paula Abdul judging a singing contest is like Christopher Reeve judging a dance contest!
Chris Rock
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Chris Rock
Age: 59
Born: 1965
Born: February 7
Comedian
Film Actor
Film Director
Film Producer
Screenwriter
Stand-Up Comedian
Television Actor
Television Presenter
Television Producer
Andrews
South Carolina
Cris Rock
Christopher Julius Rock III
Lil penny
Christopher Rock
Judging
Abdul
Dance
Reeve
Singing
Paula
Humor
Christopher
Comedy
Contest
American
Idol
Funny
Contests
Like
Idols
More quotes by Chris Rock
Men lie the most, women tell the biggest lies.
Chris Rock
Kids raised on a culture of “We’re not going to keep score in the game because we don’t want anybody to lose.” Or just ignoring race to a fault. You can’t say “the black kid over there.” No, it’s “the guy with the red shoes.” You can’t even be offensive on your way to being inoffensive.
Chris Rock
I don't write jokes first. I write down topics. I think of what I want to talk about, and then I write the jokes - they don't write me... And even if you don't think it's funny, you won't think it's boring. You might disagree, but you'll listen. And maybe even laugh as you disagree.
Chris Rock
I love my life, but I don't think I'm any happier than my younger brother Andre, who drives a garbage truck.
Chris Rock
When you're doing a big-budget movie and you're four on the call sheet, you've got a lot of free time.
Chris Rock
Happy white peoples independence day the slaves weren't free but I'm sure they enjoyed fireworks.
Chris Rock
The key to staying together is making sure you guys like each other and need each other.
Chris Rock
No matter what kind of backgrounds two men are from, if you go, 'Hey, man, women are crazy,' you've got a friend.
Chris Rock
Karaoke isn't fair when you're a comedian. The whole idea is to get people laughing and enjoying themselves, and I'm a professional funny guy.
Chris Rock
A black man will be elected President of the United States. I'm sorry, that's in the year 10,000.
Chris Rock
See, the Black man gotta fly to get to something the white man can walk to.
Chris Rock
My goal in life was to host the MTV Awards, because it's the awards show that Prince sang on, and that was the awards show that Eddie Murphy hosted and Arsenio hosted.
Chris Rock
I don't get high, but sometimes I wish I did. That way, when I messed up in life I would have an excuse. But right now there's no rehab for stupidity.
Chris Rock
Wealth is not about having a lot of money it's about having a lot of options.
Chris Rock
A comedy club is a place where you work out material, you're trying material.
Chris Rock
You cannot win in a fight against women, cause men have a need to make sense
Chris Rock
Unlike flying or astral projection, walking through walls is an earthbound pursuit.
Chris Rock
The thing I try to get across to the writers - and I do a lot of writing, too - is that when I do stand-up, nothing I talk about is funny. Everything is really sad and tragic and then I make it funny.
Chris Rock
You only know that you're smart because you're around dumb people from time to time!
Chris Rock
Smart is knowing if you're dumb. Knowing when to shut up and to listen to people that are smarter than you.
Chris Rock