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Only married people understand you can be miserable and happy at the same time.
Chris Rock
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Chris Rock
Age: 59
Born: 1965
Born: February 7
Comedian
Film Actor
Film Director
Film Producer
Screenwriter
Stand-Up Comedian
Television Actor
Television Presenter
Television Producer
Andrews
South Carolina
Cris Rock
Christopher Julius Rock III
Lil penny
Christopher Rock
People
Miserable
Married
Happy
Understand
Time
More quotes by Chris Rock
If you want to prevent abortions, you make sure everyone has health care, a high school education and birth control. Not the exact opposite.
Chris Rock
If poor people knew how rich rich people are, there would be riots in the streets.
Chris Rock
If you're black, you got to look at America a little bit different. You got to look at America like the uncle who paid for you to go to college, but who molested you.
Chris Rock
Daddy pays for the water, daddy pays for the gas, daddy pays for the electricity, and if daddy didn't pay for the electricity, he'd pay for the candle on your nightstand, so you can study for the big test tomorrow.
Chris Rock
Before I was a comedian, I thought the coolest thing that would happen to me was being a teenager... Boy, was I wrong!
Chris Rock
When you have kids, there's no such thing as quality time. There's just time. There's no, 'Ooh, his graduation's better than going to the mall.' It's all kind of equal. Changing her diaper and her winning a contest - it's all good.
Chris Rock
I do what I can do when I can do it.
Chris Rock
Early in my career it was very important that I gain the reputation. I haven't been on the road in two or three years, but when I say tickets are on sale, I know they're going to be gone, even if my movie bombed or my TV show sucked.
Chris Rock
If you live with a single parent, you don't see compromise. You witness a grown person living in a world where they do what they want to do. When you are raised by two parents, you are constantly watching compromise take place. Just by observing that, it made me a better person.
Chris Rock
They don't want you to vote. If they did, we wouldn't vote on a Tuesday. In November. You ever throw a party on a Tuesday? No. Because nobody would come.
Chris Rock
People are always going to, you know, find something wrong with people who are not the exact same as them. That's just what it is. Black, white, short, tall, religions, whatever. People are bad.
Chris Rock
I've seen women who don't have great relationships with their dads, and it all comes down to this: You have to tell girls you love them every day.
Chris Rock
I don't get high, but sometimes I wish I did. That way, when I messed up in life I would have an excuse. But right now there's no rehab for stupidity.
Chris Rock
When you make drama you are like Picasso. Drama is whatever you want it to be.
Chris Rock
If a kid calls his grandma Mommy and his mama Pam, he's going to jail!
Chris Rock
Every comedian has a moment in his life when he realizes he's a little bit different from everyone else. It's like being the only guy in a movie who sees the ghost. The ghost talks to you and you talk to him. Then you turn to your friend and say, Hey. Do you see that ghost? And he says, What ghost?
Chris Rock
Oprah is so rich, I saw John Kerry proposing to her.
Chris Rock
Yeah, I love being famous. It's almost like being white, y'know?
Chris Rock
There are people who would like to get rid of minimum wage. But we have to have it, because if we didn't some people would not get paid money. They would work all week for two loaves of bread and some Spam.
Chris Rock
I hate niggas! I hate em! I wish they'd let me join the Ku Klux Klan!
Chris Rock