Share
×
Inspirational Quotes
Authors
Professions
Topics
Tags
Quote
If a woman tells you she's twenty and looks sixteen, she's twelve. If she tells you she's twenty-six and looks twenty-six, she's damn near fourty.
Chris Rock
Share
Change background
T
T
T
Change font
Original
TAGS & TOPICS
Chris Rock
Age: 59
Born: 1965
Born: February 7
Comedian
Film Actor
Film Director
Film Producer
Screenwriter
Stand-Up Comedian
Television Actor
Television Presenter
Television Producer
Andrews
South Carolina
Cris Rock
Christopher Julius Rock III
Lil penny
Christopher Rock
Twenties
Six
Funny
Sixteen
Woman
Twelve
Women
Twenty
Looks
Near
Damn
Tells
More quotes by Chris Rock
That's a sure sign someone is going crazy - when he refers to himself in the third person, talks in low tones, and walks around wearing shades all day!
Chris Rock
The thing I try to get across to the writers - and I do a lot of writing, too - is that when I do stand-up, nothing I talk about is funny. Everything is really sad and tragic and then I make it funny.
Chris Rock
Never go to clubs with metal detectors. Sure it feels safe inside. But what about all those niggas waiting outside with guns? They know you ain't got one.
Chris Rock
I can't cook, but I have a nice book of menus... and I can plate and set the table.
Chris Rock
A black man will be elected President of the United States. I'm sorry, that's in the year 10,000.
Chris Rock
Whoever you hate will end up in your family. You don't like gays? You're gonna have a gay son. You don't like Puerto Ricans? Your daughter's gonna come home with Livin' La Vida Loca!
Chris Rock
I can see the humor in just about any situation. After I lost my dad, I realized that none of us should take things too seriously, because everything except death works itself out.
Chris Rock
A comedy club is a place where you work out material, you're trying material.
Chris Rock
Pretty girls have problems too.
Chris Rock
You can't fake comedy - it's not like a movie, where a director can just cast a pretty face.
Chris Rock
Eddie Murphy is to comedians what Nicki Minaj is to Spanx.
Chris Rock
Men lie the most, women tell the biggest lies.
Chris Rock
I think it's better to have ideas.
Chris Rock
Bill Cosby was the first comedian I was exposed to, because he doesn't curse.
Chris Rock
Black people have been qualified to be president for hundreds of years. George Washington Carver could have been president. I could go on with a list of black men that were qualified to be the president of the United States. So the Obama victory is progress for white people.
Chris Rock
Every man has to settle down eventually. You know why you gotta settle down eventually? Because you don't want to be the old guy in the club. You know what I'm talking about. Every club you go into, there's always some old guy. He ain't really old, just a little too old to be in the club.
Chris Rock
When you make comedy, you make it for the people and you try to have as many screenings and as many tests and you do focus groups and you read the cards and you try to give the people what they want in this comedy.
Chris Rock
I never had the confidence to say I was going to be in front of the camera as a comedian until I saw Eddie Murphy years later.
Chris Rock
Not a Harvard-type education, just a not-sticking-up-a-liquor-store-type education.
Chris Rock
By the time I was 7 or 8, I wanted to be a comedy writer.
Chris Rock