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Sober strip clubs are horrible. When you are sober you see the matrix code behind a strip club. You're paying girls to pretend to like you until you run out of money so they can walk away.

Chris Hardwick

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Chris Hardwick
Age: 52
Born: 1971
Born: November 23
Comedian
Film Actor
Film Director
Film Producer
Podcaster
Screenwriter
Singer
Stand-Up Comedian
Television Actor
Television Presenter
Louisville
Kentucky
Christopher Ryan Hardwick
Money
Girls
Strip
Like
Behinds
Sober
Walk
Club
Behind
Paying
Walks
Pretend
Girl
Code
Running
Clubs
Away
Horrible
Matrix

More quotes by Chris Hardwick

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Don't tell television, but there is some superior programming being made on the Interwebz.
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When I was in school, if you wanted a computer, you had to build one. But today, computers are everywhere. We're all obsessed with technology and having the latest gadgets. Nerd culture is ubiquitous.
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I feel like so much of why I sort of want to work in television is so that people know to come see me live.
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Nerds get caught up in minutiae, because there is a tremendous and fulfilling sense of control in understanding every single detail of a thing more than any other living creature.
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Fleetwood Mac is just one of my all-time favorite bands.
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Some people learn comedy, and some people just are comedy.
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I played tournament chess from fifth grade up into high school.
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Both my parents recognized early on that I wanted to do something in comedy, and they were really supportive. They're the ones who bought me Steve Martin records and let me watch R-rated comedies long before they probably should have.
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I don't know why people don't want to talk about their numbers. I guess in a sense, there's a bit of performer nudity, a bit of ego nudity when you expose your numbers, I guess because someone's are higher or someone's are lower. I've never really talked about the numbers with anyone, so maybe I'm not supposed to.
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If I wasn't acting or doing stand-up, I would be in animation. Or if I had the discipline I might studies physics.
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I had a personal blog, but why does anyone care that I went shopping for hats?
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The nerds provide the toys that distract the morons. So the nerds are sort of the new drug-dealers. We're the drug dealers of the 21st century because we provide all the brain candy for the mouth-breathers, for lack of a better word.
Chris Hardwick
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The nerdist movement is less about consumers there is a large contingent that are creative nerdists instead of consumers.
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When I was in grade school I was into chess club, Latin club, D&D, computer camp - everything that made vaginas go away.
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I just feel like, for me personally, there's just been so much election fatigue, and while I think it was very important during the election to always be on top of everything that was going on with the election via social media, I do feel like, all right, now we need a little bit of a detox. I think people need a little bit of a break from it.
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I categorize nerds as creative-obsessive. A lot of nerds are creative people who obsess almost unnaturally over the minutiae of things.
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Comment threads are the new therapy for people. They just go and post the worst things they can think of because they feel bad, and then other people start attacking them, and then they attack back.
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Every year on my birthday, I start a new playlist titled after my current age so I can keep track of my favorite songs of the year as a sort of musical diary because I am a teenage girl.
Chris Hardwick
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I was very competitive growing up. I can't even play chess anymore because I used to play tournament chess in school. There's too much sense memory of sitting in front of a chess board and getting super intense about it. It's ruined the game for me.
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When I was younger, my parents used to say, Trust us on this. We have more experience than you. And I was like, Shut up, you don't know anything! But I was an idiot. They did know more stuff because they'd experienced more things.
Chris Hardwick