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The nerds provide the toys that distract the morons. So the nerds are sort of the new drug-dealers. We're the drug dealers of the 21st century because we provide all the brain candy for the mouth-breathers, for lack of a better word.
Chris Hardwick
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Chris Hardwick
Age: 53
Born: 1971
Born: November 23
Comedian
Film Actor
Film Director
Film Producer
Podcaster
Screenwriter
Singer
Stand-Up Comedian
Television Actor
Television Presenter
Louisville
Kentucky
Christopher Ryan Hardwick
Drug
Dealer
Century
Nerd
Sort
Candy
Brain
Toys
Morons
Word
Provide
Nerds
Better
Mouth
Dealers
Mouths
Distract
Lack
Moron
More quotes by Chris Hardwick
The worst day ever was when I found out my grandfather was going to die.
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I do find some of the meanest, most exclusionary people are the nerds. And they rebel against other nerds! What are you doing? As much as I love nerds and the nerd movement, the nerd-on-nerd violence is really bad. A lot of times, nerds are the meanest ones online. And also, the trolling can be very extensive because they're smart.
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If you're able to build from your falls you'll be unstoppable and damn near fearless. You see, every time you fall down and get back up, you add another piece of body armor to yourself. You learn what not to do, how to do better, and how to create comfort through practice.
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Every year on my birthday, I start a new playlist titled after my current age so I can keep track of my favorite songs of the year as a sort of musical diary because I am a teenage girl.
Chris Hardwick
Playing Xbox for 23 hours straight is cool and all, but I'm going to teach you how to spend time on things in your life that will get you the following two things: paid and laid.
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I don't know if I'm a Twitter addict. That seems kind of harsh. I would say it's more that I'm seriously involved. That it's a long-term relationship - like a girlfriend, which my actual girlfriend loves to hear.
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We will continue to address things, but in as much as I want to talk about politics as they are related to social media, I don't necessarily want to be a political show. I want it to cover everything, everything in our culture through social media, politics, pop culture, entertainment, science, everything.
Chris Hardwick
Sober strip clubs are horrible. When you are sober you see the matrix code behind a strip club. You're paying girls to pretend to like you until you run out of money so they can walk away.
Chris Hardwick
Steal moments of happiness if you have to, and then collect them until they are the dominant images in your psyche.
Chris Hardwick
The podcast movement was really a creative survival mechanism for standup comics.
Chris Hardwick
There's a lot of money being generated by nerds right now. Bill Gates, Mark Zuckerberg, the list goes on and on. Nerds make more money than our government. And with money comes power.
Chris Hardwick
I love the South. Although I grew up primarily in Memphis, my family moved around a ton when I was a kid. I guess I never stayed in one place long enough to pick up the accent, but I definitely identify as a Southerner.
Chris Hardwick
If you can build your career around your passions, then you're winning in life that's one of the best things you can ask for.
Chris Hardwick
Some people learn comedy, and some people just are comedy.
Chris Hardwick
The difference being that a nerd would wear a D&D shirt because he loves D&D while a hipster would wear a D&D shirt because it's ridiculous that he is wearing a D&D shirt.
Chris Hardwick
Don't tell television, but there is some superior programming being made on the Interwebz.
Chris Hardwick
When I was in grade school I was into chess club, Latin club, D&D, computer camp - everything that made vaginas go away.
Chris Hardwick
One of the many reasons why I love stand-up so much is when you're performing, you get instant feedback. You know if stuff is working right away.
Chris Hardwick
I almost think of nerd brains as rattlesnake venom like, you can milk it. You can milk the pulpy venom out of the nerd brain and use it for good if you want to.
Chris Hardwick
I think doing the podcast may have been one of the best career decisions I've ever made in my life.
Chris Hardwick