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I almost shat my pants. Literally, the floor was almost covered in my shat.

Chris Colfer

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Chris Colfer
Age: 34
Born: 1990
Born: May 27
Actor
Film Actor
Film Producer
Novelist
Screenwriter
Singer
Stage Actor
Television Actor
Writer
Clovis
California
Christopher Paul Chris Colfer
Literally
Almost
Shat
Floor
Pants
Covered

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I wasn't going to get such a nice car - I was going to get a cute little hybrid or something, keep the trees happy - but then my grandfather died, and it was all: retail therapy!
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I hate to say I'm a Cinderfella, but I've been watching the Globes since I was an embryo. I got a Facebook message from an elementary school friend who said, 'I remember you standing up and talking about attending the Golden Globes when we were little.
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I was made fun of a lot in high school because of the way I sound and the way I was.
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Whether I'm in front of the camera, behind the camera, at my computer writing a novel or a screenplay, as long as I get to entertain someone out there, I'm happy.
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Sometimes you have good days, and sometimes you have bad days. It really depends on how much caffeine you've had.
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I hope to write someday and that’s even more terrifying than performing. You don’t just entertain the audience, you give them little bits of your soul.
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To be famous is to stand on a pedestal and give the world permission to tell you all your flaws.
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...because a life without meaning, without drive or focus, without dreams or goals, isn't a life worth living.
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I do better singing female songs because my voice is so high-pitched.
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Being a best-selling author just means the world for me. Some of my happiest memories, growing up, are being at book stores and reading books I couldn't afford, as a kid, and the midnight parties, waiting for the next Harry Potter book. The fact that I have that straw in my cap means more to me than anything I've ever accomplished before.
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I'm really not good blackmail material.
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If you ask me, it doesn't matter what life you're living, life never has a solution. No matter how hard the struggles are that you leave behind, new struggles always take their place.
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When one thing takes another away, what do we call that?” she asked my class. “Homicide!” I called out
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Even in the worst of situations-even when it seems no one in the world appreciates you-as long as you have hope, everthing can get better
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It doesn't matter how greatly you've been hurt or how much you're hurting, it's what you do with the pain that counts. You could cry for years or you could choose to learn and grow from it.
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There's nothing more terrifying then a teenage girl.
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Right now, we're living in an ugly chapter of our lives, but books always get better!
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I've learned that the more people embrace their disadvantages, the less disadvantaged they become!
Chris Colfer
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You’re not weak. Your life is not defined by a letter grade, a dress size, your sexuality or anything else. You have every chance at happiness. You were not meant to suffer. You are loved. Never, ever give up.
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I'm allergic to stupidity.
Chris Colfer