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I almost shat my pants. Literally, the floor was almost covered in my shat.

Chris Colfer

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Chris Colfer
Age: 34
Born: 1990
Born: May 27
Actor
Film Actor
Film Producer
Novelist
Screenwriter
Singer
Stage Actor
Television Actor
Writer
Clovis
California
Christopher Paul Chris Colfer
Shat
Floor
Pants
Covered
Literally
Almost

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My life is an awkward visit from the kid's table while awaiting a History Channel special.
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I’ve tried being other people and myself suits me the best.
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When one thing takes another away, what do we call that?” she asked my class. “Homicide!” I called out
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You'd think after thousands of years on this planet the human race would have released some kind of handbook for teenagers, telling them how to get through teenagehood and get help for their issues. Yet here we are, struggling through it in our own ways.
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Whoa, I've really got to stop making plans with fictional characters. It can't be healthy to develop relationships with people who don't exist.
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Courage is one thing that no one can ever take away from you.
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I've been pushed down many flights of stairs in my time, but I always manage to find an elevator
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No matter what you do, you can never please everyone. And that was the hardest lesson to learn. In fact, I'm still learning it.
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People only love you as long as they're getting something of you, but the minute you say something they don't want to hear or do something they don't want to see, all the admiration drains from their hearts.
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I may have no idea what I'm talking about, I said, a little ticked off now. But we're all a part of a minority waiting for a majority to pull their heads out of their asses.
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I don’t think I have the right parts to appreciate '50 Shades of Grey'.
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People still call me ma’am on the phone, and it’s just part of life now. I’m not even phased by it… Going through DriveThrus is always fun, because it’s always so shocking when they see me. It’d just be kind of like, ‘Thank you ma… woah!! Woah, sorry about that!’
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Everyone that I meet always wants me to direct, but whenever I think of directing, I think of aligning shots. I'd definitely have to write and direct something. But I don't know if I could.
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People are not born heroes or villains they’re created by the people around them.
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I grew up in a conservative small town, and the gay characters I saw on TV and in movies when I was growing up were all flamboyant and obnoxious and sometimes kind of annoying.
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A flame may love a snowflake, but they can never be together without each harming the other.
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I do better singing female songs because my voice is so high-pitched.
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I grew up doing musical theater.
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You've got to show the world who you are before it tells you. Otherwise you become victim to someone you're not.
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Even in the worst of situations-even when it seems no one in the world appreciates you-as long as you have hope, everthing can get better
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