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People who have experience and credentials, they should be talking about that [Donald Trump presenting on TV]. I know everybody cares about ratings, but come on. The whole world is watching.
Chelsea Handler
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Chelsea Handler
Age: 49
Born: 1975
Born: February 25
Actor
Autobiographer
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Film Actor
Scuba Diver
Television Actor
Television Producer
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Livingston
New Jersey
Chelsea Joy Handler
People
Trump
Everybody
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More quotes by Chelsea Handler
I don't want to be Oprah [Winfrey], I'm not trying to be Barbara Walters, but we can all do better.
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I want to start saying bad words all the time!
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For months there have been rumors that J.Lo is finally pregnant with Marc Anthony's baby. She was afraid it might never happen. I'm afraid it's going to look like Marc Anthony.
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I'll tell you what can make bacon better... nothing.
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Don't take 'no' for an answer. Keep knocking down walls until someone says 'yes.'
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Paris Hilton is one of the hosts for Nicole Richie’s baby shower, and they’re serving sushi. Awesome, Paris—sushi, the one thing pregnant women are forbidden to eat. Thanks for the mercury.
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That's what my perfume would smell like, margarita and vodka.
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I don't like the word 'alcoholic'. I like to think of myself as an advanced drinker.
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I don't know what it is about accents that makes me want to get undressed and high-five myself.
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Amy Winehouse's mother wrote an open letter to the News of the World newspaper telling Amy she's worried about her and to please call her. I doubt this is the best way to communicate with Amy - she should try spelling it out in lines of cocaine.
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A federal grand jury is investigating allegations that David Copperfield raped, assaulted and threatened a woman he took to his private island in the Bahamas in July. What happened to the good old days when a guy would just saw you in half?
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Before any exposure on TV, I'm a real chef.
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I'm not going to blow up just for the sake of it, because it's on TV. That's not the issue.
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We usually have margaritas on Thursdays but since it's Tuesday I'll make an exception.
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Good Luck Chuck, a comedy starring Dane Cook and Jessica Alba, opened today, and critics are saying it has all the belly laughs you’ve come to expect from Jessica Alba.
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I like to laugh. It's kind of escapism. I like to make people laugh. And I kind of like people just to have to not think about anything
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There's a McDonalds in Hong Kong & they're offering couples the opportunity to get married. You can have a McWedding.
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Obviously, if I was serious about having a relationship with some one long-term, the last people I would introduce him to would be my family.
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Maybe they should name more drugs cute things. I don't do meth, but maybe if they called meth 'Stefanie' I would!
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You just be honest about who you are, and if you dont end up with any friends, then good for you.
Chelsea Handler
