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There should be a talent that goes along with being famous.

Chelsea Handler

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Chelsea Handler
Age: 49
Born: 1975
Born: February 25
Actor
Autobiographer
Biographer
Comedian
Film Actor
Scuba Diver
Television Actor
Television Producer
Writer
Livingston
New Jersey
Chelsea Joy Handler
Goes
Famous
Along
Talent

More quotes by Chelsea Handler

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I would never get married while my father is still alive because I wouldn't want him to walk me down the aisle.
Chelsea Handler
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Paula Abdul's really impatient to start a family. She says if she has to wait much longer she's going to go crazy-er.
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I think it's important to be authentic to who you are, and if you're inauthentic at all, people smell that from a mile away.
Chelsea Handler
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Amy Winehouse's mother wrote an open letter to the News of the World newspaper telling Amy she's worried about her and to please call her. I doubt this is the best way to communicate with Amy - she should try spelling it out in lines of cocaine.
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People confuse the fact that I discuss drinking openly with the idea that I'm a heavy drinker. I don't want girls at my show wasted, screaming and yelling out and vomiting.
Chelsea Handler
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Why he would agree to install an eight-by-eight-foot fish tank and then not fill it with a single dolphin made me want to burn his eyebrows off.
Chelsea Handler
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I’m a ridiculous person. If you take anything any comedian says seriously, then you’re stupid.
Chelsea Handler
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I like to just follow what I find compelling. In order for me to be compelling, I have to be compelled. I don't try to think about what people are interested in seeing, I have to be interested. For me, that works the best.
Chelsea Handler
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They travel in groups. You never see an Asian by their self.
Chelsea Handler
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Can you imagine getting a gun for a secret Santa? That is especially not a good idea if you work in a post office.
Chelsea Handler
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I like to laugh. It's kind of escapism. I like to make people laugh. And I kind of like people just to have to not think about anything
Chelsea Handler
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When I don't know what to do, I just open my mouth. Why won't anyone date me?
Chelsea Handler
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Hispanics still have the highest rate amongst teens with babies so at least the future housekeeping is secure.
Chelsea Handler
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The only reason I think I would marry a foreigner would be to have kids with weird accents.
Chelsea Handler
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That's what my perfume would smell like, margarita and vodka.
Chelsea Handler
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But then, like George Michael in a men's bathroom, I got cocky.
Chelsea Handler
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My tendency to make up stories and lie compulsively for the sake of my own amusement takes up a good portion of my day and provides me with a peace of mind not easily attainable in this economic climate.
Chelsea Handler
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... some of the best sex I can barely remember.
Chelsea Handler
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The only people I owe an apology to are my dead parents. Except my father because he's still alive.
Chelsea Handler
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I definitely don't want to have kids ... I don't think I'd be a great mother. I'm a great aunt or friend of a mother ... I don't want to spend that kind of time. I don't want to have a kid and have it raised by a nanny. I don't have time to raise a child.
Chelsea Handler