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Paula Abdul's really impatient to start a family. She says if she has to wait much longer she's going to go crazy-er.
Chelsea Handler
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Chelsea Handler
Age: 49
Born: 1975
Born: February 25
Actor
Autobiographer
Biographer
Comedian
Film Actor
Scuba Diver
Television Actor
Television Producer
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Livingston
New Jersey
Chelsea Joy Handler
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Start
Abdul
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Paula
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My theory about Taylor Swift is that she's a virgin, that everyone breaks up with her because they date her for two weeks and she's like, 'I'm not gonna do it'.
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I never say the things I really want to. If I did, I'd have no friends.
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People confuse the fact that I discuss drinking openly with the idea that I'm a heavy drinker. I don't want girls at my show wasted, screaming and yelling out and vomiting.
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As you get older, then you finally come back around full circle when you don't give a s - anymore and you decide I'm going to just tell the truth to everybody. I don't give a s - if anybody likes me.
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There should be a talent that goes along with being famous.
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My life and my legs have been an open book.
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I don't mean to be a racist but if you're going to get raped by a Japanese guy, it's not going to hurt at all.
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Rumer Willis was having a great time at the opening of a club when her twin walked in, also known as her dad, Bruce Willis. How embarrassing for her, she's out with her friends and they're like, 'Umm, Rumer, I think your dad put something in my drink.'
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A lot of amazing comedians that I've worked with just really follow their instincts and you can't really teach someone comedic timing. And you just kind of have it.
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I have a question. Do you guys think it's OK to drink while you're pregnant if you're planning on giving the baby up for adoption?
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I like to stay at home and sit on my ass.
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Jessica Simpson attended boyfriend Tony Romo's football game. The Cowboys quarterback had the worst game of his career. It's a bad year for the name Simpson. Even O. J. is pissed - he feels like they're making his name look bad.
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I had sex with a couple guys but it wasn't a baseball team. I saved that for my twenties.
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A federal grand jury is investigating allegations that David Copperfield raped, assaulted and threatened a woman he took to his private island in the Bahamas in July. What happened to the good old days when a guy would just saw you in half?
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Or people who have one baby and go buy a minivan... how big is your baby?
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Don't choose the better guy, choose the guy that's gonna make you the better girl
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