Quote

According to an article on CNN.com, a new study says people who are bad kissers don't get laid. Where are you supposed to learn how to kiss? If you go to Catholic school, it's from your priest in public school, you learn from your teacher and some guys learn from their sisters... if their sister is Angelina Jolie.

Chelsea Handler

Change background

T
T
T

Change font

TAGS & TOPICS

Chelsea Handler
Age: 49
Born: 1975
Born: February 25
Actor
Autobiographer
Biographer
Comedian
Film Actor
Scuba Diver
Television Actor
Television Producer
Writer
Livingston
New Jersey
Chelsea Joy Handler
Study
Kiss
Angelina
Public
According
Article
Guy
Kissing
Priest
Learn
Catholic
Sisters
School
Supposed
Articles
People
Guys
Laid
Teacher
Priests
Says
Sister
Jolie

More quotes by Chelsea Handler

Image
We women have to stick together.
Chelsea Handler
Image
I've always been exactly who I am on TV. I'm not playing a role.
Chelsea Handler
Image
In these tough economic times, everybody has to cut back. I am down to three tabs of ecstasy a day.
Chelsea Handler
Image
[Gordon Ramsay] knows about being bullied, because look at the size of him.
Chelsea Handler
Image
I know they don't recommend Ibuprofen during pregnancy, but you needed something fast for the hangovers.
Chelsea Handler
Image
Even if times are tough and you're enduring a terrible heartache, it's important to focus your anger on a vibrator, not another person.
Chelsea Handler
Image
I'm a worker. I like to work and I like to provide work for other people. I like to put people on my show who normally would never have a chance at being on television.
Chelsea Handler
Image
You don't mess with janitors, first of all, they have like 40 keys, and 1 is to a closet you don't want to be inside of.
Chelsea Handler
Image
A federal grand jury is investigating allegations that David Copperfield raped, assaulted and threatened a woman he took to his private island in the Bahamas in July. What happened to the good old days when a guy would just saw you in half?
Chelsea Handler
Image
I haven't been manipulated. I did a documentary in prison years ago because I was so f - ed off with those lazy bastards in their bed for 18 hours a day, five dishes a day on a menu to choose from, playing soccer every day, going to the gym, watching movies.
Chelsea Handler
Image
Instead of having a baby, why dont you get a tattoo of a baby first, and see how that works out for six months to a year, and then see if you're ready to have a baby.
Chelsea Handler
Image
You should always speak your mind, and be bold, and be obnoxious, and do whatever you want and don’t let anybody tell you to stop it.
Chelsea Handler
Image
It's also a terrible kind of sentiment [ reality TV] for children and for people. It makes people feel like they all want to be famous for no reason.
Chelsea Handler
Image
They travel in groups. You never see an Asian by their self.
Chelsea Handler
Image
First of all, i'm not an actor - I'm an asshole.
Chelsea Handler
Image
A lot of people think that keying a car isn't the right way to get back at a guy. I disagree.
Chelsea Handler
Image
If someone took the 'F' letter off me, I'd be ucked.
Chelsea Handler
Image
We spend so much money on these dresses that are terrible. And what do we get out of it? Nothing - a piece of chicken and a roll in the hay with her hillbilly cousin - no thank you. My family's very close I can do that at home.
Chelsea Handler
Image
We're doing a bunch of shoots with kids about the election, about politics, about racism. I like to talk about heavy topics with kids because you find out what their parents are feeding them at home, and then you find out their quick reactions to things. It's so refreshing when kids are so honest.
Chelsea Handler
Image
The only reason I think I would marry a foreigner would be to have kids with weird accents.
Chelsea Handler