Share
×
Inspirational Quotes
Authors
Professions
Topics
Tags
Quote
... some of the best sex I can barely remember.
Chelsea Handler
Share
Change background
T
T
T
Change font
Original
TAGS & TOPICS
Chelsea Handler
Age: 49
Born: 1975
Born: February 25
Actor
Autobiographer
Biographer
Comedian
Film Actor
Scuba Diver
Television Actor
Television Producer
Writer
Livingston
New Jersey
Chelsea Joy Handler
Barely
Sex
Humor
Funny
Remember
Best
More quotes by Chelsea Handler
We're not actors, we're people behaving like ourselves on TV. We're both [me and Gordon Ramsay] exactly who we are on TV. I don't think either one is an exaggerated version. You just have to be who you are.
Chelsea Handler
Getting rewarded for being pregnant when you're a teenager? Are you serious? I mean, that makes me want to kill somebody.
Chelsea Handler
I can remember my first one-night stand like it was yesterday. Well, maybe not the first. Or the second... or the fifth. I'll just begin with what I can remember and not concern myself with order.
Chelsea Handler
[Gordon Ramsay] knows about being bullied, because look at the size of him.
Chelsea Handler
We spend so much money on these dresses that are terrible. And what do we get out of it? Nothing - a piece of chicken and a roll in the hay with her hillbilly cousin - no thank you. My family's very close I can do that at home.
Chelsea Handler
People tend to call me names that I can't repeat on basic cable. I will give you a hint. They rhyme with itch, hunt, & bore.
Chelsea Handler
A Catholic priest who’s been sending threatening notes to Conan O’Brien was charged with stalking in the fourth degree. It just goes to show you that people can become obsessed with redheads.
Chelsea Handler
They travel in groups. You never see an Asian by their self.
Chelsea Handler
According to the New York Post, Lance Armstrong and Ashley Olsen are dating. They must be getting serious - Lance gave Ashley his yellow Live Strong bracelet. She wears it as a belt.
Chelsea Handler
My mom was kinda like a cat. She slept a lot.
Chelsea Handler
I know they don't recommend Ibuprofen during pregnancy, but you needed something fast for the hangovers.
Chelsea Handler
It's also a terrible kind of sentiment [ reality TV] for children and for people. It makes people feel like they all want to be famous for no reason.
Chelsea Handler
I like to just follow what I find compelling. In order for me to be compelling, I have to be compelled. I don't try to think about what people are interested in seeing, I have to be interested. For me, that works the best.
Chelsea Handler
I think the people in your life are the people that - when you can make other people happy and you can give things to your family and your friends, you know, that's really obviously what life is all about. But it doesn't have to be children. It doesn't have to be a husband. It can be whatever you make it.
Chelsea Handler
Instead of having a baby, why dont you get a tattoo of a baby first, and see how that works out for six months to a year, and then see if you're ready to have a baby.
Chelsea Handler
If someone took the 'F' letter off me, I'd be ucked.
Chelsea Handler
My life and my legs have been an open book.
Chelsea Handler
I had an abortion when I was 16. Because that's what I should have done. Otherwise I would now have a 20-year-old kid. Anyway, those are things that people shouldn't be dishonest about it.
Chelsea Handler
I think it's important to be authentic to who you are, and if you're inauthentic at all, people smell that from a mile away.
Chelsea Handler
If you want to have sex with strangers, you have to do it the old fashion way and become a prostitute.
Chelsea Handler
