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When I look at all the people that I have working for me and the company I've started and all the people that benefit from it and have a living because of it, it's very motivating to continue to do it.

Chelsea Handler

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Chelsea Handler
Age: 49
Born: 1975
Born: February 25
Actor
Autobiographer
Biographer
Comedian
Film Actor
Scuba Diver
Television Actor
Television Producer
Writer
Livingston
New Jersey
Chelsea Joy Handler
Living
Look
Motivating
Looks
Benefit
People
Benefits
Continue
Started
Company
Working

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When I don't know what to do, I just open my mouth. Why won't anyone date me?
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I've always been exactly who I am on TV. I'm not playing a role.
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You've got guys on freeways with motorbikes with no helmets on, you can't drink until you're 21 and we wonder why so many youth are smoking f - ing cannabis, and you can start driving here at 15. How f - ed up is that?
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Paris Hilton has launched a new champagne in a can called Rich Prosecco. For the ad campaign Paris posed wearing nothing but gold paint. That’s a unique way to cover up herpes.
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I like to just follow what I find compelling. In order for me to be compelling, I have to be compelled. I don't try to think about what people are interested in seeing, I have to be interested. For me, that works the best.
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[Gordon Ramsay] knows about being bullied, because look at the size of him.
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Are you there vodka? It's me, Chelsea. Please get me out of jail and I promise I will never drink again. Drink and drive. I will never drink and drive again. I may even start my own group fashioned after MADD, Mothers Against Drunk Driving, but I'll call it AWLTDASH, Alcoholics Who Like to Drink and Stay Home.
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It's hard on an all-gay softball team because no one knows if they want to be a pitcher or a catcher.
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You do not OWN a dog. You HAVE a dog. And the dog HAS YOU
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They travel in groups. You never see an Asian by their self.
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I think reality television, unless it's inspirational, which it very rarely is, I think it's embarrassing. It's embarrassing state of affairs that we're in.
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I don't know what it is about accents that makes me want to get undressed and high-five myself.
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You get photographed together when there's 25 people with you and people assume that you're having sex, which is definitely not the case.
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A lot of people think that keying a car isn't the right way to get back at a guy. I disagree.
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I have more respect for somebody who's like, 'Yeah I like to party, so screw off,' then for Tara , who talks about not partying and ends up passed out underneath a Subway, not a subway station, but the actual sandwich shop - two days later.
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There are two kinds of people I don't trust: people who don't drink and people who collect stickers.
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I had to sit down and explain to [her friend] that AA was for quitters
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He laid into me with the same gusto as a right-wing political pundit on the O'Reilly Factor defending President's Bush right to vacation six days out of the week.
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I definitely don't want to have kids ... I don't think I'd be a great mother. I'm a great aunt or friend of a mother ... I don't want to spend that kind of time. I don't want to have a kid and have it raised by a nanny. I don't have time to raise a child.
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You don't give something away because it's fat. You take it and you look at it.
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