Share
×
Inspirational Quotes
Authors
Professions
Topics
Tags
Quote
Good Luck Chuck, a comedy starring Dane Cook and Jessica Alba, opened today, and critics are saying it has all the belly laughs you’ve come to expect from Jessica Alba.
Chelsea Handler
Share
Change background
T
T
T
Change font
Original
TAGS & TOPICS
Chelsea Handler
Age: 49
Born: 1975
Born: February 25
Actor
Autobiographer
Biographer
Comedian
Film Actor
Scuba Diver
Television Actor
Television Producer
Writer
Livingston
New Jersey
Chelsea Joy Handler
Come
Cooks
Dane
Good
Critics
Starring
Luck
Jessica
Expect
Chuck
Laughing
Laughs
Comedy
Belly
Saying
Cook
Today
Opened
Alba
More quotes by Chelsea Handler
People ask me why I'm so hard on men. It's because they've gotten a really easy ride. And it's not that I think women should take over the world. But I do think it should be 50/50.
Chelsea Handler
My life and my legs have been an open book.
Chelsea Handler
In these tough economic times, everybody has to cut back. I am down to three tabs of ecstasy a day.
Chelsea Handler
He laid into me with the same gusto as a right-wing political pundit on the O'Reilly Factor defending President's Bush right to vacation six days out of the week.
Chelsea Handler
There's a difference between watching a chef show, which doesn't feel like a reality show compared to the Housewives. Those shows can, I think, not only lower your IQ, but really just knock the wind out of you, because we're all here in this business.
Chelsea Handler
I think reality television, unless it's inspirational, which it very rarely is, I think it's embarrassing. It's embarrassing state of affairs that we're in.
Chelsea Handler
You get photographed together when there's 25 people with you and people assume that you're having sex, which is definitely not the case.
Chelsea Handler
Instead of having a baby, why dont you get a tattoo of a baby first, and see how that works out for six months to a year, and then see if you're ready to have a baby.
Chelsea Handler
Obviously, if I was serious about having a relationship with some one long-term, the last people I would introduce him to would be my family.
Chelsea Handler
As you get older, then you finally come back around full circle when you don't give a s - anymore and you decide I'm going to just tell the truth to everybody. I don't give a s - if anybody likes me.
Chelsea Handler
I like to stay at home and sit on my ass.
Chelsea Handler
We usually have margaritas on Thursdays but since it's Tuesday I'll make an exception.
Chelsea Handler
I like to laugh. It's kind of escapism. I like to make people laugh. And I kind of like people just to have to not think about anything
Chelsea Handler
I have more respect for somebody who's like, 'Yeah I like to party, so screw off,' then for Tara , who talks about not partying and ends up passed out underneath a Subway, not a subway station, but the actual sandwich shop - two days later.
Chelsea Handler
The important thing is to be drunk.
Chelsea Handler
Women don't have to be jealous of other women.
Chelsea Handler
Before any exposure on TV, I'm a real chef.
Chelsea Handler
It's also a terrible kind of sentiment [ reality TV] for children and for people. It makes people feel like they all want to be famous for no reason.
Chelsea Handler
Paris Hilton has launched a new champagne in a can called Rich Prosecco. For the ad campaign Paris posed wearing nothing but gold paint. That’s a unique way to cover up herpes.
Chelsea Handler
If diamonds are a girl's best friend, I wonder if blood diamonds are a girl's best friend 5 days out of the month?
Chelsea Handler
