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My bodyguard was mowing the lawn in a pink bikini when the body fell from the sky.

Charlaine Harris

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Charlaine Harris
Age: 73
Born: 1951
Born: November 25
Actor
Author
Camera Operator
Crime Writer
Film Producer
Karateka
Novelist
Poet
Screenwriter
Short Story Writer
Writer
Tunica
Mississippi
Charlaine Harris Schulz
Body
Bikini
Bodyguard
Bikinis
Lawn
Lawns
Pink
Fell
Sky
Mowing

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Oh, God, puppy dog eyes. From a six-foot-five ancient Viking vampire.
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Don’t you just hate nights like that, when you think over every mistake you’ve made, every hurt you’ve received, every bit of meanness you’ve dealt out? There’s no profit in it, no point to it, and you need sleep.
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I’d never seen anything like it. First a trial, then a few murders, then dancing. Life goes on. Or, in this case, death continues.
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The note, which had been written on one of the pads I kept around for grocery lists, said, My lover, I came in too close to dawn to wake you, though I was tempted. Your house is full of strange men. A fairy upstairs and a little child downstairs- but as long as there's not one in my lady's chamber, I can stand it.
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Vampires. They wrote the book on possessive.
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I realized that I was really tired of people popping on and off of my property like it was a train station on the supernatural railroad.
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Most humans were on one big island, to the fairies, and that island was adrift on a sea called I Totally Don’t Care.
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Though I was standing in front of a mirror, I wasn't really seeing my reflection. I was seeing, very clearly, that—at the moment—I was all in the world that Eric could think of as his own. I had better not fail him.
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I knew, as sure as I knew my name, that tomorrow he would send me another coat, in a big fancy box, with a big bow on it. It would be the right size, it would be a top brand, and it would be warm. ............... It was cranberry red, with a removable liner, a detachable hood, and tortoiseshell buttons.
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It was one of God's jokes that such a dumb mind had been put in such an eloquent body.
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I freely admit I know nothing about television or writing for the screen.
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I had two cups of coffee, put Eric's jeans in the washer, read a romance for awhile, and studied my brand-new Word of the Day calendar, a Christmas gift from Arlene. My first word of the New Year was 'exsanguinate.' This was probably not a good omen.
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Very few of my characters are totally heroic or totally villainous.
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You think that it’s not magic that keeps you alive? Just ‘cause you understand the mechanics of how something works, doesn’t make it any less of a miracle. Which is just another word for magic. We’re all kept alive by magic, Sookie. My magic’s just a little different from yours, that’s all.
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You've reached Fantasia, where the undead live again every night, For bar hours, press one. To make a party reservation, press two. To talk to alive person or a dead vampire, press three. Or, if you were intending to leave a humorous prank message on our answering machine, know this: we will find you.
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It was beautiful Eric, who desired me, who was hungry for me, in a world that often let me know it could do very well without me.
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Pam: Claude, the mouthwateringly beautiful asshole?
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I would've asked him to bring a shovel and come to help me dig a body up. That was what a boyfriend should do, right? -Sookie Stackhouse
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Episcopalians are pretty thin on the ground in the central United States.
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Silver, gold - I don't discriminate! I like sparkly things.
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