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I’m not a damsel and there is no distress

Carrie Jones

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Carrie Jones
Age: 54
Author
Novelist
Singer
Writer
Bedford
New Hampshire
Damsel
Distress

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It's hard to save the world when you can't save yourself
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I am not 'most' and I am not 'people'.
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We all live with our losses. We don't want to, but we can
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Loving you is a full-time job. It's a great job, don't get me wrong. It's the best job in the universe. But it's not easy.
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It's a lot easier to understand things once you name them. It's the unknown that mostly freaks me out. I don't know the name of that fear, but I know I've got it, the fear of the unknown.
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Is everyone as wrong about me as I am about them?
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Nobody is perfect, though. We all want everyone to think we are, but perfection is some crazy mythical state that we can never achieve. It is a goal beyond our grasp, always shifting and changing and taunting us, because it knows...it knows we can never reach it.
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What I have learned lately is that people deal with death in all sorts of ways. Some of us fight against it, doing everything we can to make it not true. Some of us lose our selves to grief. Some of us lose ourselves to anger.
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The ending has to fit. The ending has to matter, and make sense. I could care less about whether it's happy or sad or atomic. The ending is the place where you go, “Aha. Of course. That's right.”
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We all have to feel empty sometimes.
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There is no easy off button for your brain.It would be really really nice if there were.
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Friends help friends fight pixies.
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That's what people who love you do: they hold you and lie. They tell you that you're worthy, that everything will be all right, and they do that even when you both know without a doubt that this is not true, that is it nowhere near the truth.
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What feels best is how I no longer hurt.
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I just think about how saying that you love someone can make your heart feel like some sort of brownie sundae, warm, gooey, sweet and good.
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Emotions are real, just not the reasons behind them.
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Losing people you love affects you. It is buried inside of you and becomes this big, deep hole of ache. It doesn't magically go away, even when you stop officially mourning.
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Astley comes to my side. 'Are you well?' 'No,' I tell him, voice hoarse. 'I am not well. I am broken inside. I am broken almost all-the-way deep, and I don't know...I don't know if I can ever be unbroken, let alone well again'
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I used to be embarrassed by my mom, but now I know what she is-she's a hero.
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