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The compulsion to find a lover and husband in a single person has doomed more women to misery than any other illusion.

Carolyn Heilbrun

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Carolyn Heilbrun
Single
Compulsion
Women
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Misery
Illusion
Husband
Marriage

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A dog is the only exercise machine you cannot decide to skip when you don't feel like it.
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Ardent, intelligent, sweet, sensitive, cultivated, erudite. These are the adjectives of praise in an androgynous world. Those who consider them epithets of shame or folly ought not to be trusted with leadership, for they will be men hot for power and revenge, certain of right and wrong.
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Professors of literature collect books the way a ship collects barnacles, without seeming effort.
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Everyone likes to talk shop, which is the most interesting talk in the world, in the beginning.
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One cannot make up stories one can only retell in new ways the stories one has already heard.
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Shifting problems is the first rule for a long and pleasant life.
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In former days, everyone found the assumption of innocence so easy today we find fatally easy the assumption of guilt.
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Once you are thought selfish, not only are you forgiven a life designed mainly to suit yourself, which in anyone else would appear monstrous, but if an impulse to generosity should by chance overpower you, you will get five times the credit of some poor selfless soul who has been oozing kindness for years.
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Power is the ability to take one's place in whatever discourse is essential to action and the right to have one's part matter.
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Today's youth seem finally to have understood that only by freeing woman from her exclusively sexual role can man free himself from his ordained role in the rat-race: that of the rat.
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To recommend that women become identical to men, would be simple reversal, and would defeat the whole point of androgyny, and for that matter, feminism: in both, the whole point is choice.
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. . . a relationship has a momentum, it must change and develop, and will tend to move toward the point of greatest commitment.
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... success always worries academics, when it moves into the popular world.
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Is there any vanity greater than the vanity of those who believe themselves without it?
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as the years go on a sense of deep patience comes over one one seems to know the virtue of ripeness, and the danger of rushing events.
Carolyn Heilbrun
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Quoting, like smoking, is a dirty habit to which I am devoted.
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The sign of a good marriage is that everything is debatable and challenged nothing is turned into law or policy. The rules, if any, are known only to the two players, who seek no public trophies.
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Whether animals admit it or not, they and I communicate.
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What marks a writer is this: until she - or he, of course - writes down whatever happened, turns it into a story, it hasn't really happened, it hasn't shape, form, reality.
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Quoting, like smoking, ... is a dirty habit to which I am devoted. But then ... I am a professor of English literature it is an occupational hazard.
Carolyn Heilbrun