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If the guests want to wrest the check away from the host, because the host is also the guest of honor, then the guest who volunteers has to cover the whole thing. A guest can't volunteer -all- of the guests to pay for the host/honoree.

Carolyn Hax

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Carolyn Hax
Age: 57
Born: 1966
Born: December 5
Columnist
Journalist
Writer
Bridgeport
Connecticut
Carolyn Hanley Hax
Pay
Guest
Away
Volunteer
Also
Guests
Whole
Host
Thing
Check
Cover
Checks
Wrest
Honor
Volunteers

More quotes by Carolyn Hax

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There's nothing like a good family when you're really up a tree.
Carolyn Hax
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It's probably good for your body and brain to get moving occasionally.
Carolyn Hax
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Sometimes the pain outweighs the good things.
Carolyn Hax
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A lot of support gets withheld out of fear of awkwardness and misspeaking.
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If you take the time to listen to an upset child's story with empathy, and guide the child toward figuring out the root of the problem, then the result is often that the child not only calms down, but also in the future is less likely to get so upset.
Carolyn Hax
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Make sure you have legal cover for what you're doing.
Carolyn Hax
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Being highly invested and preoccupied by an emotionally consuming mission tends to steal resources from other aspects of your emotional life.
Carolyn Hax
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Separation is where you see if it works better with the adults in two different homes.
Carolyn Hax
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Moving is hard. Staying is easy. Logistically speaking, at least. And this is true whether you're doing or undoing something.
Carolyn Hax
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The topic of sexual education makes me nuts, because kids are certainly not now and have rarely ever been clueless about what adults do and delude themselves about keeping from their kids. Especially now that so many of them are carrying the entire internet around in their pockets.
Carolyn Hax
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When in doubt, respond to what you witness, not what you hear secondhand.
Carolyn Hax
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For me, the greatest source of frustration was trying to work with a willful child when there was something else I wanted - say, to get the child to go to bed so I could have my own time. Just the promise of the time, and feeling that promise slip away, was enough to introduce a whole other element of stress into the encounter.
Carolyn Hax
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There's nothing wrong with being happy somewhere, even if it's the little pond you grew up in, as long as you are in fact comfortable vs. bored.
Carolyn Hax
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You can't make people like you under the best of circumstances, and you certainly can't make them like you while you're actively badgering them on what you perceive to be their failures of conscience.
Carolyn Hax
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We all make deals with ourselves when it comes to the difficult people in our lives.
Carolyn Hax
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I think a person who arranges the event and orders the food also picks up the check - even the birthday person, even when people at the table insist on paying for the birthday person.
Carolyn Hax
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When you fail to see something, that doesn't mean I'm hiding it.
Carolyn Hax
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Live in the moment, this moment, your moment. That is by far and without meaningful rival The Best Position to put yourself in to discover and delight in who your children turn out to be, whoever they turn out to be.
Carolyn Hax
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Apparently you have ample proof from experience that you're not going to stop world evil by debating your in-laws into submission, so it's okay to choose not to try.
Carolyn Hax
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Some people can work amid chaos or conversations, and some can't - and while there's no doubt an element of brain wiring to it, there's also the possibility of acquiring skills that improve your focus.
Carolyn Hax