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I can't tell a joke to save my soul. It's just not my thing, though I love to listen to jokes.

Carol Burnett

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Carol Burnett
Age: 91
Born: 1933
Born: April 26
Actress
Comedian
Dancer
Film Actor
Screenwriter
Singer
Stage Actor
Television Actor
Television Presenter
Voice Actor
Writer
Military City
USA
Carol Creighton Burnett
Thing
Love
Joke
Jokes
Save
Listen
Though
Tell
Soul

More quotes by Carol Burnett

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You have to go through the falling down in order to learn to walk. It helps to know that you can survive it. That's an education in itself.
Carol Burnett
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I love to write. I have always loved writing. That was my first love.
Carol Burnett
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But I don't begrudge anybody, because I know how hard it is to have that dream and to make it happen, whether or not it's just to put a roof over your head and food on the table.
Carol Burnett
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there were times when I was more at home in front of millions of people than I was at home.
Carol Burnett
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I couldn't get the laughter out of my head. It wasn't career. It wasn't even a choice. It was a calling.
Carol Burnett
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In '57, I got a job at the Blue Angel nightclub, and a gentleman named Ken Welch wrote all my material for me. I lived at a place called the Rehearsal Club that was actually the basis for a play called Stage Door.
Carol Burnett
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I don't eat much meat, fish, or poultry.
Carol Burnett
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I think the hardest thing to do in the world, show-business-wise, is write comedy.
Carol Burnett
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But I didn't ask to have somebody nose around in my private life. I didn't even ask to be famous. All I asked was to be able to earn a living making people laugh.
Carol Burnett
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I've always been able to recount things and I have a really good memory about dialog and what people have said before and this and that.
Carol Burnett
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It's also selfish because it makes you feel good when you help others. I've been helped by acts of kindness from strangers. That's why we're here, after all, to help others.
Carol Burnett
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You know, one wonderful thing that came out of my Enquirer experience is that, in my case, it was ruled tabloids are magazines. Which means they didn't have the protection that a newspaper has.
Carol Burnett
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Because nobody goes through life without a scar.
Carol Burnett
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I was once asked to do my Tarzan yell at Bergdorf Goodman, and a guard burst in with a gun! Now I only do it under controlled circumstances.
Carol Burnett
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If you want to know the feeling [of labor pain], just take your bottom lip and pull it over your head.
Carol Burnett
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You have to have faith that there is a reason you go through certain things. I can't say I'm glad to go through pain, but in a way one must, in order to gain courage and really feel joy.
Carol Burnett
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You do have to love your kids enough to let them hate you. But it's the disease that's hating you, not them.
Carol Burnett
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I have always grown from my problems and challenges, from the things that don't work out, that's when I've really learned.
Carol Burnett
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Words, once they are printed, have a life of their own.
Carol Burnett
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I'm glad I was born when I was. My time was the golden age of variety. If I were starting out again now, maybe things would happen for me, but it certainly would not be on a variety show with 28 musicians, 12 dancers, two major guest stars, 50 costumes a week by Bob Mackie - the networks just wouldn't spend the money today.
Carol Burnett