Quote

It is never okay to use the toilet with the door open... I never want to know what comes out of there because sometimes I eat at that restaurant.

Carlos Mencia

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Carlos Mencia
Age: 57
Born: 1967
Born: October 22
Actor
Comedian
Dancer
Screenwriter
Singer
Stand-Up Comedian
Television Producer
Voice Actor
Ned Arnel Mencía
Ned Mencía
Carlos Mencía
Ned Holness
Ned Arnel Mencia
Open
Use
Toilet
Comes
Toilets
Sometimes
Restaurant
Never
Restaurants
Door
Okay
Doors

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Why are we rebuilding New Orleans? Whose idea was this, Aquaman?
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The essence of what makes life beautiful is the fact that it can go away.
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When women can't climax, it's our fault, but when we can't get an erection, we have to go to the doctor.
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And for all of you at home, you are all welcome to visit my store. You are also welcome to park off you motherparking parks, and go park yourself. But remember, don't park in a handicapped spot.
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I grew up in the projects and I know how important it is for kids to have hope.
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Why did the 14-year old Mexican girl end up pregnant? Because her teacher told her to go do an essay.
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I never, nor will I, put another person down to feel better about myself. I will live and die by what I do, not what anyone else thinks about me.
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When you are younger, you pretend to believe, but you are proving it to everyone and to yourself. The change comes when you know you're funny on the inside. Then you don't have to prove it to anybody else anymore. That's when you become different and that's when you evolved onto a completely different level, because you know who you are.
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Dee Dee Dee dosen't mean mentally retarded. It means stupid. This song goes out to all the stupid people out there. Your gonna find this song hilarious, and you don't even know it's about you.
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Racism is exclusion, that's why I make fun of everybody.
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When it comes to my daughter, I'm a conservative. But when it comes to your daughter, I'm a liberal!
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Do not encourage my behaviour.
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Hurricane Katrina was caused by political correctness. I said it!
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I'll know America is in bad shape when Cubans in Miami get in the water and swim back to Cuba.
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At the end of the day, I don't think I am going to be judged by what happened in the 90's and 2000's, at the end of the day my career will be judged from beginning to end and everything in between.
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If God made Adam and Eve, they had children... wait a minute... that means someone banged their sister!
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When I was young and didn't have money, I liked gambling because winning and losing was fun for the rush of it. The amount of money that I would have to put down now to get that rush, there is no f'ing way I'm going to do it. It's just stupid. I would rather get that rush some other way.
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Know your religion, know who you are and don't be ashamed.
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We celebrate Labor Day by not going to work?
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In all honesty, we don't know what's in the hearts of other men. All I know is that I respect comedy and I know comedy. I would never, ever, ever take somebody else's joke.
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