Quote

The elements in a relationship which seem impossible to share, the secretly disturbing, dissatisfying elements, are the most rewarding to share. This is a hard, risky, frightening thing to learn, and it needs to be re-learned over and over.

Carl Rogers

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Carl Rogers
Age: 85 †
Born: 1902
Born: January 8
Died: 1987
Died: February 4
Non-Fiction Writer
Psychologist
Psychotherapist
Oak Park
Illinois
Carl Ransom Rogers
Learned
Risky
Share
Secretly
Impossible
Rewarding
Learn
Disturbing
Seems
Frightening
Hard
Elements
Needs
Seem
Thing
Relationship

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I realize that if I were stable, prudent and static I'd live in death. Therefore I accept confusion, uncertainty, fear and emotional ups and downs because that's the price I'm willing to pay for a fluid, perplexed and exciting life.
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Experience is, for me, the highest authority.
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The only reality I can possibly know is the world as I perceive it at this moment. The only reality you can possibly know is the world as you see it at this moment. And the only certainty is that those perceived realities are different. There are as many “real worlds” as there are people!
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Don't be the ammunition wagon, be the rifle... knowledge exists primarily for use.
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The education situation which most effectively promotes significant learning is one in which (1) threat to the self of the learner is reduced to a minimum and (2) differential perception of the field of experience is facilitated
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There is in every organism, at whatever level, an underlying flow of movement toward constructive fulfillment of its inherent possibilities.
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Growth occurs when individuals confront problems, struggle to master them, and through that struggle develop new aspects of their skills, capacities, views about life.
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I prize the privilege of being alone.
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I have learned that in any significant or continuing relationship, feelings which are persistent had best be expressed. If they are expressed as feelings owned by me, the result may be temporarily upsetting but ultimately far more rewarding than any attempt to deny or conceal them.
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Empathy is a special way of coming to know another and ourself, a kind of attuning and understanding. When empathy is extended, it satisfies our needs and wish for intimacy, it rescues us from our feelings of aloneness.
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It is the client who knows what hurts, what directions to go, what problems are crucial, what experiences have been deeply buried.
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Life, at its best, is a flowing, changing process in which nothing is fixed.
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The degree to which I can create relationships, which facilitate the growth of others as separate persons, is a measure of the growth I have achieved in myself.
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The only person who cannot be helped is that person who blames others.
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In my early professional years I was asking the question: How can I treat, or cure, or change this person? Now I would phrase the question in this way: How can I provide a relationship which this person may use for his own personal growth?
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There are as many real worlds as there are people!
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What you are to be, you are now becoming.
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Man's inability to communicate is a result of his failure to listen effectively.
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True empathy is always free of any evaluative or diagnostic quality. This comes across to the recipient with some surprise. If I am not being judged, perhaps I am not so evil or abnormal as I have thought.
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