Quote

If the time comes when our culture tires of the endless homicidal feuds, despairs of the use of force and war as a means of bringing peace, becomes discontent with the half-lives that its members are living - only then will our culture seriously look for alternatives.

Carl Rogers

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Carl Rogers
Age: 85 †
Born: 1902
Born: January 8
Died: 1987
Died: February 4
Non-Fiction Writer
Psychologist
Psychotherapist
Oak Park
Illinois
Carl Ransom Rogers
Look
Force
Alternatives
Looks
Lives
Seriously
Despairs
Mean
Living
Endless
Feuds
Time
Use
Despair
Homicidal
War
Members
Tires
Means
Becomes
Discontent
Culture
Half
Tire
Comes
Peace
Bringing

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Empathy is a special way of coming to know another and ourself, a kind of attuning and understanding. When empathy is extended, it satisfies our needs and wish for intimacy, it rescues us from our feelings of aloneness.
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If we value independence, if we are disturbed by the growing conformity of knowledge, of values, of attitudes, which our present system induces, then we may wish to set up conditions of learning which make for uniqueness, for self-direction, and for self-initiated learning.
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If I can listen to what he can tell me, if I can understand how it seems to him if I can see its personal meaning for him, if I can sense the emotional flavor which it has for him, then I will be releasing potent forces of change in him.
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Loneliness is a barrier that prevents one from uniting with the inner self.
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No other person's ideas, and none of my own ideas, are as authoritative as my experience.
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Experience is, for me, the highest authority.
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The elements in a relationship which seem impossible to share, the secretly disturbing, dissatisfying elements, are the most rewarding to share. This is a hard, risky, frightening thing to learn, and it needs to be re-learned over and over.
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The good life is a process, not a state of being. It is a direction not a destination.
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Openness to all attitudes no matter how extreme or unrealistic they may seem.
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It's an awful risky thing to live
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There is in every organism, at whatever level, an underlying flow of movement toward constructive fulfillment of its inherent possibilities.
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The only person who cannot be helped is that person who blames others.
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Allowance of the freedom of choices in direction, either for the group or individuals particularly in the near future.
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It is the client who knows what hurts, what directions to go, what problems are crucial, what experiences have been deeply buried.
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Powerful is our need to be known, really known by ourselves and others, even if only for a moment.
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In my early professional years I was asking the question: How can I treat, or cure, or change this person? Now I would phrase the question in this way: How can I provide a relationship which this person may use for his own personal growth?
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I have learned that in any significant or continuing relationship, feelings which are persistent had best be expressed. If they are expressed as feelings owned by me, the result may be temporarily upsetting but ultimately far more rewarding than any attempt to deny or conceal them.
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When a person realizes he has been deeply heard, his eyes moisten. I think in some real sense he is weeping for joy. It is as though he were saying, Thank God, somebody heard me. Someone knows what it's like to be me.
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Most of us consist of two separated parts, trying desperately to bring themselves together into an integrated soma, where the distinctions between mind and body, feelings and intellect, would be obliterated.
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