Quote

Empathy is a special way of coming to know another and ourself, a kind of attuning and understanding. When empathy is extended, it satisfies our needs and wish for intimacy, it rescues us from our feelings of aloneness.

Carl Rogers

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Carl Rogers
Age: 85 †
Born: 1902
Born: January 8
Died: 1987
Died: February 4
Non-Fiction Writer
Psychologist
Psychotherapist
Oak Park
Illinois
Carl Ransom Rogers
Understanding
Aloneness
Wish
Satisfies
Feelings
Extended
Another
Rescue
Needs
Intimacy
Kind
Empathy
Way
Coming
Rescues
Special
Ourself

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Life is about Being & Becoming.
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Most of us consist of two separated parts, trying desperately to bring themselves together into an integrated soma, where the distinctions between mind and body, feelings and intellect, would be obliterated.
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Life, at its best, is a flowing, changing process in which nothing is fixed.
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If I can listen to what he can tell me, if I can understand how it seems to him if I can see its personal meaning for him, if I can sense the emotional flavor which it has for him, then I will be releasing potent forces of change in him.
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If we value independence, if we are disturbed by the growing conformity of knowledge, of values, of attitudes, which our present system induces, then we may wish to set up conditions of learning which make for uniqueness, for self-direction, and for self-initiated learning.
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Growth occurs when individuals confront problems, struggle to master them, and through that struggle develop new aspects of their skills, capacities, views about life.
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It's an awful risky thing to live
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The good life is a process, not a state of being. It is a direction not a destination.
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The curious paradox is that when I accept myself just as I am, then I can change.
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We cannot change, we cannot move away from what we are, until we thoroughly accept what we are. Then change seems to come about almost unnoticed.
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Loneliness is a barrier that prevents one from uniting with the inner self.
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I realize that if I were stable, prudent and static I'd live in death. Therefore I accept confusion, uncertainty, fear and emotional ups and downs because that's the price I'm willing to pay for a fluid, perplexed and exciting life.
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Am I living in a way which is deeply satisfying to me, and which truly expresses me?
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I have learned that in any significant or continuing relationship, feelings which are persistent had best be expressed. If they are expressed as feelings owned by me, the result may be temporarily upsetting but ultimately far more rewarding than any attempt to deny or conceal them.
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In my early professional years I was asking the question: How can I treat, or cure, or change this person? Now I would phrase the question in this way: How can I provide a relationship which this person may use for his own personal growth?
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The paradigm of Western culture is that the essence of persons is dangerous thus, they must be taught, guided, and controlled by those with superior authority.
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True empathy is always free of any evaluative or diagnostic quality. This comes across to the recipient with some surprise. If I am not being judged, perhaps I am not so evil or abnormal as I have thought.
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It is a direction not a destination.
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The only reality I can possibly know is the world as I perceive it at this moment. The only reality you can possibly know is the world as you see it at this moment. And the only certainty is that those perceived realities are different. There are as many “real worlds” as there are people!
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