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There is a theory that sooner or later anything in America that is any fun at all will be ruined by people from California.

Calvin Trillin

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Calvin Trillin
Age: 89
Born: 1935
Born: December 5
Journalist
Novelist
Poet
Kansas City
Missouri
Calvin Marshall Trillin
Anything
People
Ruined
Sooner
California
Later
Theory
Fun
America

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The Banh Mi sandwich is really the only good argument for colonialism.
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It was a given in our family that my father was a grocer so that I wouldn't have to be.
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As part of my research for An Anthology of Authors' Atrocity Stories About Publishers, I conducted a study (employing my usual controls) that showed the average shelf life of a trade book to be somewhere between milk and yoghurt.
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When you're writing, you are robbed of your delivery.
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I don't cook. I don't know anything about food. I've never reviewed a restaurant.
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Everything was blamed on Castro. Mudslides in California. The fact that you can't buy a decent tomato anymore. Was there an exceptionally high pollen count in Massapequa, Long Island, one day? It was Castro, exporting sneezes.
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Canadians are very well behaved, they don't throw their food.
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I've decided to skip 'holistic'. I don't know what it means, and I don't want to know. That may seem extreme, but I followed the same strategy toward 'Gestalt' and the 'Twist', and lived to tell the tale.
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In modern America, anyone who attempts to write satirically about the events of the day finds it difficult to concoct a situation so bizarre that it may not actually come to pass while his article is still on the presses.
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Taking pleasure in the dark side may be some sort of occupational hazard for reporters.
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When someone reaches middle age, people he knows begin to get put in charge of things, and knowing what he knows about the people who are being put in charge of things scares the hell out of him.
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We all know funny people who can't get it down on the page - even funny writers who can't get it down on the page.
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It has long been acknowledged that the single best restaurant in the world is Arthur Bryant's Barbecue at Eighteenth and Booklyn in Kansas city.
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If Lincoln freed the slaves and preserved the Union, how come 'Lincolnesque' just means tall?
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Being on a book tour is a lot easier than reporting.
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Everybody is who he was in high school.
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Law professors were never like economics professors, a Harvard Law professor told me. If you disagreed with someone, you didn't call him a fool.
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Avoid restaurants with names that are improbable descriptions, such as the Purple Goose, the Blue Kangaroo or the Quilted Orangutan.
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