Quote

At American weddings, the quality of the food is in inverse proportion to the social position of the bride and groom.

Calvin Trillin

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Calvin Trillin
Age: 88
Born: 1935
Born: December 5
Journalist
Novelist
Poet
Kansas City
Missouri
Calvin Marshall Trillin
Position
Food
Quality
Groom
American
Weddings
Social
Inverse
Bride
Brides
Proportion

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I don't cook. I don't know anything about food. I've never reviewed a restaurant.
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Everything was blamed on Castro. Mudslides in California. The fact that you can't buy a decent tomato anymore. Was there an exceptionally high pollen count in Massapequa, Long Island, one day? It was Castro, exporting sneezes.
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If law school is so hard to get through... how come there are so many lawyers?
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Law professors were never like economics professors, a Harvard Law professor told me. If you disagreed with someone, you didn't call him a fool.
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I suppose that there are endeavors in which self-confidence is even more important than it is in writing -- tightrope walking comes immediately to mind -- but it's difficult for me to think of anybody producing much writing if his confidence is completely shot.
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It was a given in our family that my father was a grocer so that I wouldn't have to be.
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When it comes to Chinese food I have always operated under the policy that the less known about the preparation the better. A wise diner who is invited to visit the kitchen replies by saying, as politely as possible, that he has a pressing engagement elsewhere.
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Since nostaglia is fueled by inflation, could it be that inflation is the result of a conspiracy by the people who are trying to palm off McGovern buttons and Howdy Doody puppets and their Aunt Thelma's toaster as antiques.
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Being on a book tour is a lot easier than reporting.
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I never did very well in math - I could never seem to persuade the teacher that I hadn't meant my answers literally.
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There's always a source for humor [in politics]. If it's inappropriate to write about, if there's nothing funny about it, then it's not funny. So it sort of selects itself. It has to. And plus, often something that wouldn't be funny at the time is okay to make jokes about later.
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Money not spent on a luxury one considered even briefly is the equivalent of windfall income and should be spent accordingly.
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The most remarkable thing about my mother is that for thirty years she served the family nothing but leftovers. The original meal has never been found.
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In modern America, anyone who attempts to write satirically about the events of the day finds it difficult to concoct a situation so bizarre that it may not actually come to pass while his article is still on the presses.
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There's always a source for humor.
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A new regulation for the publishing industry: The advance for a book must be larger than the check for the lunch at which it was discussed.
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I've written three books you could think of as memoirs.
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Anybody who doesn't think that the best hamburger place in teh world is in his home town is a sissy.
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Avoid restaurants with names that are improbable descriptions, such as the Purple Goose, the Blue Kangaroo or the Quilted Orangutan.
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When someone reaches middle age, people he knows begin to get put in charge of things, and knowing what he knows about the people who are being put in charge of things scares the hell out of him.
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