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Whenever I see a taboo, I just think that's something we need to drag screaming out into the light and discuss. Because taboos are where our fears live, and taboos are the things that keep us tiny. Particularly for women.
Caitlin Moran
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Caitlin Moran
Age: 49
Born: 1975
Born: April 5
Columnist
Film Producer
Journalist
Music Journalist
Writer
Brighton
England
Catherine Elizabeth Moran
Women
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Live
Drag
Need
Fears
Needs
Particularly
Something
Tiny
Things
Whenever
Taboos
Think
Keep
Taboo
Thinking
Light
Screaming
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You just wanted to be normal. It wasn't even being beautiful. I just wanted to be smooth and thin and have, and you know, have beautiful glossy hair and lovely clothes and be able to walk in heels. And I thought that once I did all of that stuff that my life would begin.
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If you've been fat, you will always feel and see the world as a fat person you know how difficult it is... It's the same coming from a working-class background... it never leaves you.
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I just want Tina Fey to be my best friend. And Lena Dunham. And Oprah, too.
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All the things that are taboo are the things that are not normal, and all the things that are not normal are the things that are exclusively about physically being a woman.
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You should write, write, write every day, and learn to edit and pare it right back so you're proud of every sentence, and each one is either being useful or beautiful, but hopefully both.
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I think loads of women have this idea that their life is going to start at some point, once they've busted all these problems of being a woman, once we're thin and we're pretty and we've got all of our clothes and stuff, that's when our life will begin. And you meet people at 48 who are still thinking that, and 58.
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But as the years went on, I realised that what I really want to be, all told, is a human. Just a productive, honest, courteously treated human.
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If you read all your history books, there are no women in them.
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If you are lying down to give birth, gravity is not helping you. You know, you stand up and, you know, a baby will basically kind of fall out of you, if you keep walking 'round.
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If I'm going to spunk £500 on a pair of designer shoes, it's going to be a pair that I can a) dance to 'Bad Romance' in and b) will allow me to run away from a murderer, should one suddenly decide to give chase.
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I can't think of anything I hate more than a former punk - they are the most self-righteous people in the world.
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Women are feminist by default.
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To say that you have to carry to term and look after a child for the rest of your life is to say I force you, legally, to love someone. It's like saying, you know, you have to go and love another - you have to go - you know, you have to go marry someone. It's like an arranged marriage.
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Why on earth have I, because I'm a woman, got to be nice to everyone?
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I loved Riot Grrl. Not only was it a punk rock revolution, but it meant you could get dressed for a night out for less than two pounds!
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For me, and I suspect a lot of socially awkward people, dealing with people face-to-face seems really traumatic. Particularly if you have massive sweating issues, and particularly if on top of that you have quite smelly sweat that smells like onion soup.
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I read something once that when you're online, your inhibitions are lowered to the state where you've had three drinks. Once you basically know that the entire internet is slightly drunk, it all makes a lot more sense, and you deport yourself accordingly.
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