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In the end I want to spend my 60s writing bonkbusters like Jilly Cooper.
Caitlin Moran
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Caitlin Moran
Age: 49
Born: 1975
Born: April 5
Columnist
Film Producer
Journalist
Music Journalist
Writer
Brighton
England
Catherine Elizabeth Moran
Cooper
Spend
Ends
Writing
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More quotes by Caitlin Moran
I was brought up in the '80s. I was born in 1975. So by the time I got to 10 and I kind of knew that I probably was going to have to be a grown-up lady at some point, the feminine role models that I had were kind of the cast of Dynasty and Dallas. And I just found that terrifying.
Caitlin Moran
I always give three pieces of advice to all the teenage girls when I do my talks: long country walks - it's important to get some fresh air in your lungs, and be in contact with your body masturbation - it takes the edge off, it'll get you through and the revolution - believing in changing the world.
Caitlin Moran
I think loads of women have this idea that their life is going to start at some point, once they've busted all these problems of being a woman, once we're thin and we're pretty and we've got all of our clothes and stuff, that's when our life will begin. And you meet people at 48 who are still thinking that, and 58.
Caitlin Moran
I read something once that when you're online, your inhibitions are lowered to the state where you've had three drinks. Once you basically know that the entire internet is slightly drunk, it all makes a lot more sense, and you deport yourself accordingly.
Caitlin Moran
If I'm going to spunk £500 on a pair of designer shoes, it's going to be a pair that I can a) dance to 'Bad Romance' in and b) will allow me to run away from a murderer, should one suddenly decide to give chase.
Caitlin Moran
When you've got a mother who's given birth to eight children, you know, often without any kind of medical intervention - just she gave birth to one of my brothers sort of on the bedroom floor in front of all of us -you know, you see that women are fairly capable.
Caitlin Moran
When you talk to a young teenage girl, they're just full of self-loathing. The reason they feel self-loathing is they don't feel normal. It is a world that has not been built for them. It's been built for men, and that's why they feel bad.
Caitlin Moran
I can't think of anything I hate more than a former punk - they are the most self-righteous people in the world.
Caitlin Moran
Why on earth have I, because I'm a woman, got to be nice to everyone?
Caitlin Moran
To say that you have to carry to term and look after a child for the rest of your life is to say I force you, legally, to love someone. It's like saying, you know, you have to go and love another - you have to go - you know, you have to go marry someone. It's like an arranged marriage.
Caitlin Moran
I like a little bit of revolution. I think it's a very good hobby for a young woman. Better than squash.
Caitlin Moran
The people around you are mirrors, I think. You see yourself reflected in their eyes. If the mirror is true, and smooth, you see your true self. That’s how you learn who you are.
Caitlin Moran
You think it doesn't really matter if you screw up this time around because you can just sort it all out in paradise
Caitlin Moran
Whenever I see a taboo, I just think that's something we need to drag screaming out into the light and discuss. Because taboos are where our fears live, and taboos are the things that keep us tiny. Particularly for women.
Caitlin Moran
I never wanted to be famous. It was amusing at first, but now I hate it. I just wanted to be respected by people I respect. And I wanted to be rich. It's best to get rich, then you can do what you want.
Caitlin Moran
A 'sign of weakness' for a male celebrity is being found to be unfaithful, or unkind to an employee, or having crashed their car while stoned out of their tiny minds. A 'sign of weakness' for a woman, on the other hand, can be a single, unflattering picture.
Caitlin Moran
I’m neither ‘pro-women’ nor ‘anti-men’. I’m just ‘Thumbs up for the six billion
Caitlin Moran
Heaven. The biggest waste of our time we ever invented, outside jigsaws.
Caitlin Moran
If you eat enough books, you start pooping out words.
Caitlin Moran
For me, and I suspect a lot of socially awkward people, dealing with people face-to-face seems really traumatic. Particularly if you have massive sweating issues, and particularly if on top of that you have quite smelly sweat that smells like onion soup.
Caitlin Moran